Ok, this daily blogging thing sems to have fallen in a heap. Sorry. I am finally shaking the flu feeling, so a bit more energy there, and the boss is away from work today, so I can do it now, but it's been hard to find the time/effort, so sorry to James and anyone else who didn't mind reading this each day and then kinda got into the habit and then there were no updates, cos I know what that's like, and it's like annoying but here's a VERY short update to what happened over the past 5 episodes, just so when the CHANGE happens on Monday (oh god), James and Suse know what's been happening.
Last Friday was one of the biggest episodes in recent history, but I've spoken about it to most people who read this page at length, either irl or sms or gchat or whatever, so just the basics. Janelle, Bree and Steiger all left, gone up to Cairns, and it was a lovely send off, even though they were three of teh best characters on the street. They had a party in the street, and most of teh Neighbours were there, and then tehre was a surprise from Steiger (he had a few), and a celebrant rocked up, and Janelle & he got married! It was beautiful, and Janelle made a wonderful speech to everyone there, called Susie Q her 'Yoda', and Karl hassled her about a Best Of The Easybeats record she'd borrowed, and it was so sweet, tehre were tears everywhere, not just on screen. Then they had their bridal dance, and Daryl Braithwaite steppe out of teh crowd!! Best cameo ever, and Janelle fainted, and Daryl and his band mimed terribly to One Summer, but it was very very fun and a great send off. Then in his last surprise, Steiger took them all down the sportsfield and they left in a helicopter, with an aerial view of Susan, Karl, Zeke, Rachel, Harold, Lou, Ned, Pepper and Janae all waving, which was great. Janae obvioulsy stayed, at the last minute, pushed out of teh chopper by Janelle who told her she's got a month to find out what's going on with Ned, and then she could come up. The fact she's appearing in the Queen Street Mall tomorrow will give some idea of how that'll pan out in the future, but at this stage, they're still both "... I ain't sayin nothin".
So onto this week, and I'll just give a truly brief rundown on each plot.
*Ned, Janae & Mickey - as I said, they're still not together, although the amount of people telling them they're stuipid for not being is growing. Mickey's been in a bit of shit, cos he was vey worried about going to school after the childcare bullyig, so Janae gave him a peptalk about not letting the kids push him around, so now he's put another kid's arm in a sling, unprovoked. Mickey's the bully now, and a bit of a shit one, cos he's the shortest 8 year old ever, although if you're reading this DAVID TAYLOR, my bullying friend from Yr 7, I can relate. Ned and Janae to get together this week, surely. The grossness has now worn almost completely off, since at least we got our girl still here.
*Oliver's been one of the biggest plots this week too - he's found his real mum. It's Jane Hall from All Together Now, not that James will know a poor 1992 Australian sitcom, but the point is, I doubt very much that Jane Hall is 10 years older than Oliver, let alone old enough to be a non-scandalous mum. Anyways, she's Alan Napier's kinda-estranged daughter, and Oliver tracked her down, went to her house, she told him to fuck off, because she's got a son called Declan (lol, shit name kid) who doesn't have to know about her dirty little secret that was Oliver. You see, she didn't just put him up for adoption, she put him on Ebay, and sold him to the Barnses, who then raised him as their own, and nobody knew the truth except the Napiers. Anyways, she's not like a crazy unreasonable lady, just scared or something, so she's met with Oliver a few times now, just hookin up at the General Store n shit, and they've both had a coupla "You abandoned me!!" "I have a family to think of!" "I AM YOUR FAMILY!!!" spackouts, but they're gonna keep meeting, on Rebecca's (that's her name) conditions that she contacts Oliver, not the otehr way round, it's all by her rules. Elle's not pleased at any of this, and confronted Rebecca at he house about it, which was a bit stupid, but hey she and Oliver and kissy kissy and in love, so fair enough. Except it's not, cos guess who we're getting hints at is Oliver's Dad... Anyone around who can't remember who he rooted about 20 years ago, and didn't know it turned out as a baby anyway? the final A CHANGE IS COMING ads contain a few plot spoilers, including "Brother + Sister = Lovers", so unless they're talking about Zeke's ceiling-wanking phase over that titty mag with Katya in it, and I don't think that one of the CHANGEs they'll make, then Oliver and Elle doing it just got incestuous.
*Rosie and Frazer's wedding has ben pushed up by a few months just in time for teh CHANGE, or rather, because the venue has decided to cancel its bookings and close for a year to do major renovations. Therefore, teh wedding is next week, and Rosie's been a shrieking stressmonster, and Frazer's been very funny taking the piss. Theirs is a fantastic relationship, and if I may say, I relate to it very much. I'm Frazer. He's doing extra exercises for his legs, and last night he wa lifting his legs in the chair, still a bit cripped, but definitely getting better. Can someone smell a walk down the aisle? The groom just stands there anyway I suppose, but yeah, he'll be back to normal after clearing up all his family shit pretty quick. F&R have been the week's frantic funny plot, and they do it incredibly well. Pepper and Adam are back together too (he arrived back outta nowhere on teh Timmins goodbye show, sorry), and are pretty sweet together.
*Ringo, on the other hand, is having a bit of a shit time with his feelings for Carmella, and she's not making it easy on him. They're undoubtedly attracted to each other, and he's putting the huge moves on her, and she's saying no, then turning around and almost kisssing him, then telling him he's too young... but it's dangerously close to getting it on. It's all a bit gross, and also a bit meh, cos you don't really care about either of them that much, especially when Ringo's being a bit pushy and sleazy and omg zitty, so it's been secret talks about their feelings, and denials, and living in the same house forcing them into tempting situations, and whatever. Last night was the peak of it, as Ringo came into Carmella's room to chat, then chat up, and she was all "No, too young... *wants*" but then Rosie came in to rabble on about flower decorations or napkin folding or other wedding emergencies, so Ringo dived under the bed. Frazer came in too, giving this bedroom its longest scene ever, and they talked forever, dropping things and picking them up without discovering the hiding under his paws Ringo, but finally they spotted him, and oh boy, was it on. To protect Carmella, although not sure against what, Ringo took the blame, and Frazer and esp Rosie think he's a total perv, hiding in Carmella's room to sniff her bras or something. Frazer was about to send him home, and ther were all sorts of excuses, but finally Ringo apologised to Carmella, she forgave him, and they're all staying. It was prety fkn mean of Carmella to put him through all that, cos now they think he's dirty gross, but anyways, we'll see where that goes. The interesting thing was on Wed or Thurd night they ran with the whole "My sister and your brother are getting married - we'll be like brother and sister", in what I reckon was an attempt to throw people off the advertised spolier of Brother + Sister = Lovers. Anyway, the plot's a bit creepy.
*Tom has been a MAJOR focus this week, driving the street a little bit mad hoarding everyone's newspapers and mail in the garage like a magpie, and taking Zeke down the pub for a beer (Zeke tricked him with a ginger beer, and Boyd glared at someone pretending to break the law while pouring it, in what may well have been his only scene this week!) so Susan decided to get a nurse in to look after Tom each day while they're at work. The nurse was a bloke, and Zeke, who's developed a really strong bond with Tom, pretending to be Karl and all, hated him from the start. It was a bit unreasonable really, cos the guy had just rocked up, but then, whattya know, as soon as teh door was closed, he was a total fkn arse. Like, a real prick. He just kept telling Tom it was nap time, locked him in his room and lounged around teh house eating ice-cream out of the tub, and it was that nice Hudson Homer ice cream or soemthing too, and he's just dipping the spoon back in so a K-K can eat his slag later. Gross. Come lunchtime, you could tell he was a total prick, because he ate the steak sandwich Susan had left in the fridge for Tom, and gave Tom baked beans. Fkn hell, whatta ya think it is, bush week? Susan and Zeke arrive home to check during big lunch, so the nurse swapped the plates back, and when Tom told Susan what was going on, the nurse basically just did the loopy finger movements near his head, went cross-eyed and pointed at Tom. He also said $100 had gone missing from his wallet, so Susan was apologetic and gave him the cash back (she only had $40 on her at the time), but Zeke wasn't fooled at all, defended Tom and had a big bond with the old guy. It seemed like the start of a big plot, where the nurse was gonna become the latest Terrence/Guy Sykes evil dude to hate, but Zeke was too smart to even let the shonky nurse get a foothold in, cos for teh second day there, he got hold of a video camera from Toadie, and presumably set it up to Long Record or soemthing, and taped the day's happenings. In some lucky angling of the camera, it caught shonknurse stealing Susan's earrings, and Tom catching him doing it, and the nurse being a prick back to him, so when Zeke showed Susan, teh nurse did a runner. Gone! Rachel called the cops and Susan apologised to Zeke and Tom, so it seems like that plot was quicksticks wrapped up thanks to Zekester: Teen Detective, but there'll have to be more Tom shenanigans. Karl wasn't there for any of this. Maybe he's gone back to visit Holly, unsure. Love this family.
*Steph started running for council for real this week, and her and Toad's in-fighting about her campaign got out of hand (with some little bit gross passionate make-up sloppies along the way), and when Steph did the good ole throwing-away-the-pre-written-speech-and-speaking-fropm-the-heart-to-raptuous-applause bit at her launch, Toad cracked it and so he's running for council himself now, to prove he can do it better. Steph's all about being real and sticking up for the community, and Toad's political cynicism is beautiful. His campaign poster is a picture of him, Bob and Frazer in his wheelchair, holding an Aus flag. Fkn brilliant. A local journo (chick) interviewed both candidates together, and obviously favoured the chick (chicks), and so went for the whole sordid dirt after Toadie, like he's a mysogyinst ex-wrestler wifebeating Liberal candidate, so he's gonna get pummelled, proving that politics really is a grassroots system powered by the people or something. I dunno.
*Who else? Paul? He's been searching for stuff to do basically, and Oliver lost his shit at him as he's trying too hard to help out with decisions around Lassiter's, even though he's technically only the Dad of the owner (and the owner's bf), and I don't really remember what else. He's being nice to everyone, and no more talk of Gail. Harold's been a bit quiet too I think, oh no, not really... He's a bit upset that Sky and Caleb are going on a trip together. They're going to Sydney maybe, to see some art exhibition expo lecture collection portfolio thing, I dunno, and I really don't fkn care, and would she just fuck off? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr! So yeah, soemthgn going on there, you'll see when you get back I guess.
Last non-CHANGEd ad this evening, promise I will write it up before the CHNAGE happens. Must go! Work n real world stuff, bum.
Friday 20 July 2007
Thursday 12 July 2007
Four Neighbours In One Day
Sorry for the utter slackness this week loyal readers, but I've had the shitty stupid flu, then when I got back to work I was in fairly decent trouble for not doing work stuff at work, like, ever, so blogging has kinda been taken down a priority notch or 2, and I apologise. Instead of trying to do each episode this week so far, and that's Mon-Thurs, I'll just run you through the highlights of each character/plot this week. Then I'll try to be gooder for you in the future. Sorry again, especially considering there's only one week after this one til the big CHANGE. Crikeys.
Tom, as in Karl's Dad, not Susan's priestbossloverprick, has been a focus of this week. You'll remember he's got the dementias, and is pretty non-lucid most of the time, or at least, not operating in the same dimension as everyone else, as he calls Zeke Karl, thinks he's back on the farm, and it's 1960 or so. He's staying at K&S's place, but there's got to be someone there to look after him at all times, and that's obvioulsy a little hard. Rachel was looking after him earlier this week, but he seemed okay, even quite lucid, realising he was in Karl & Susan's place, that he'd been calling Zeke the wrong name, and that he had dementia and it must be hard on them all. He was 100% with it, so as Rachel spilled her guts about troubles in paradise with her bf (more later) he told her to shuffle next door to work it all out, he was right. She did. He wasn't. Fkn Tom has an argument with Audrey, can't work out how to turn the tele down or off, and goes to make a cuppa, 'cept he makes the old dementia person's #1 folly of putting the electric kettle on the stove. Jeepers. Then he makes the old dementia person's #461 folly of thinking he has to dip the sheep when he's really in the city 40 years later, so he vamooses outta there, and there's obviously a fire. There was talk, with the CHANGE and all, that everything was going to have a makeover, including the sets, so I thought maybe this was gonna be a real house fire that meant the place had to be rebuilt, but I was just being over-paranoid, as all it did was smoke a shitload and blacken the bench a bit. Racehl and Ringo discovered it in time, but Karl went off at Rachel for being irresponsible, which she was, but he was fairly harsh. Anyways, they still had to find Tom, and they did, standing in the middle of the road telling cars to get off his property and yelling "Bloody council!" He was alright, but the decision was made he needs 24 hour attention, and despite Zeke andRachel for some reason saying that they could do it, Karl scouted around and found a nursing home waiting list for his Dad in Eden Hills. The swish part of town. A lot's happening in these scenes without much happening, in that Karl and his Dad's relationship is being explored and explained, and some of the things Tom says to Zeke are hurtful or sweet towards Karl, and it's really well done. Even though he's on a waiting list ("Shouldn't take too long for a spot to come up though" says a hopeful Karl, meaning he's sending his Dad to a home where he's hoping people die pretty regularly) they decided to put on a See You Later Tom In Case You Don't Remember To Not Eat A Electricity Sandwich Or Something party, so a coupla old blokes (Harold & Lou) come over, and they listen to the old 45s, and talk about when the world was simpler and black & white and Tom has a mental trip through history complaining about the current Prime Minister (first Menzies, then, oh no, he's gone isn't he, oh Fraser...) and being a real communist. I didn't remember, but my hott gf did, that Tom was actually a Communist, and this is proved when he's ragging on all the old Liberal PMs, and Rachel says "Yeah, if I was old enough, I'd vote Labor" and Tom tells her to wash her mouth out, it's the red flag for him all the way, and then sings a Communist anthem. Wow. I love the backstories on Neighbours, but that seems really... just a bit weird. So at this stage Tom's still staying with the K-Ks as long as it takes to get him into a closer home, and they might get a nurse in to help.
Frazer & Rosie's wedding is getting closer, and they each have a few things going on too. After Pepper saw his foot tapping along at a wedding dance rehearsal, she did the manic "OMG I saw what happened and if you don't tell Rosie I will" "I'll tell her at the right time"... very reminiscent of the George Brown revelation. Anyways, he told her that his foot had moved a coupla times, in a very straightforward manner, and she was happy, and that was it. They had a few drinks down the Scarlet B... sorry, Charlie's to celebrate, where THORN had overtaken Steph's SEGA bike record again. This THORN just keeps beating her score, but Steph never sees anyone unusual playing it, so what's going on? Steph's accusation that girls can't ride like that, and a bet later, and it's revealed that THORN is in fact Rosie, who used to play the same game in breaks at uni. As a result of winning the bet, Frazer gets $100 off Toadie, and Steph has to dress in leg warmers, leotards etc and sing an '80s power ballad at the wedding. There are a lot of pop culture references here, like a shitload, and Boyd, in his only scene so far this week, thank fuckitty, says "I'll download a list of '80s power ballads off the internet!", cos he doesn;t know any, like a real fkn tosswit. A few names are thrown around, Every Rose Has Its Thorn, I Wanna Know What Love Is, Total Eclipse Of The Heart, and the entire Toto catalogue, but I don't think we know what Steph's settled on. I'm hoping for Suddenly by Angry Anderson - it's worked before. Briefly, the Toad & Steph storyline hasn't gone much anywhere this week - she's still running for council, he;s still heping her, they probably mucked around a bit, but nothing extraordinary.
So Frazer & Rosie are all in love n stuff, but as always, there are familial complications, this time by Rosie's Dad, Rocco, the first Camenitti we ever met, probably about 5 or 6 years ago now. He's still doing time in the big house, but he rings Rosie, who promptly hangs up on him. Frazer's a bit "Hey he's your Dad... and you made me get in contact withmy jerkass parents" so they go and visit him. He wants to walk Rosie down the aisle, and can apply for day release on compassionate grounds - Rosie chucks a spack that he's got some nerve, Frazer talks to him man-to-man, he doesn't think much of Mr Yeates, but eventually F gets R to agree, on the condition that he bahves himself, doesn;t try anything cunning-like. Rosie's sure he's gonna try to escape or something, and it'll be very disappointing if she's wrong. That Rocco is a tricky one.
Earlier in the week there was a bit of focus on Oliver too. Last week I forgot to mention, because that's what you do with Oliver, that Elle had given him the results of the DNA test to see if Alan Napier was his grandad or not, and his parents not really. I think he burned them without looking at them, but Paul saw him burning something, Oliver did his world's-least-convingly-liar act, and later when he did the same act to Elle who was asking about the result, Paul added it all together. So against both Ollie-wollie and good Paul's wishes Elle used the services of one of Paul's old dodgy acquaintances to ask some questions, do some looking around. They got his birth certificate, but it's got his supposed parents' names on there, so they had to have bought/adopted/stolen/whatevered him pretty darn early. Napier's got 2 kids, a son and a daughter, so if he is Napier's grandkid, one of them is his parent. Oliver tracked down the son, who slammed th door in his face, and then reopened it once Oliver hit it hard enough, and then talked to him. I'd be more inclined to talk to someone the less they'd smashed the shit out of my door, but nonetheless. He's not Ollie's dad, but he said his sister could be his Mum. She disappeared for a while around (Oliver's age) years ago and something else, I dunno, but look, she could be it. Except he doesn;t know where she lives, and even if he did, he wouldn;t tell Oliver - she bad news, and she'll only bring you heartache and misery. That sort of thing. So Oliver doesn;'t know where he stands, and we don't really care much.
Onto the next characters, why not Ringo and Carmella. Yep, not Ringo and Rachel. They split up, actually when Rach went next door, leaving Tom to start a fire. Turns out Ringo does have the hotts for Carmella, and guess what? It's mutual!!! OMG! Well kinda. They've been practising dancing together for the wedding, and that's led to a lot of staring in each other's eyes, and this climaxed early in the week when they did a fruit run together. Ringo's fired from her business, but there was some buyer who didn't like the skinny one, so Ringo had to tell them he'd bought the business off her and fired her so they'd give the company heaps of money. Therefore, for the delivery, it had to be Ringo driving, with Carmella, in the car cos he's on his Ls, hiding ingeniously under a blanket in the front seat of the ute, peeking out to see what was going on, which of course you'd have to if there was a fruit-for-money transaction going on. I mean who wouldn't want to see that?! It all goes well, the ute is parked in the front yard of this Carmella-hating buyer's farm or whatever, and then there's one of the worst conceived premises in recent history - before they drive off, they're taking about dancing, and so Ringo drags her out of the car and they have a waltz. In the field. Next to the ute. The same ute that only a minute ago Carmella had to hide under a blanket in. Now the people who hate Carmella are probably looking out their window saying "WTF? There's that bitch we won't buy fruit off, dancing with the bloke who sacked her and took all our fruit money, in our front yard! WTF is happening?!?" As anyone who's seen popular culture before knows, spontaneous dancing always leads to gazing into each others' eyes, and an admittance that they <3 each other. That doesn't happen here, at least not yet, and that might have more to do with Ringo's amazingly zitty complexion than anything. Wow, he's very spotty indeed, even with the obvious makeup. His zits aren't just red n white dots, they're very bumpy too, so the term Crater Face doesn't apply so much as Olgas Face. Anyways, Carmella doesn't feel like Ringo, so after coming very close to some liptimacy (intimacy of the lips, new word I'm trying out) she does the brush off and they drive home. Ringo dumps Rachel and confronts Carmella about it later, but she denies that she wanted to kiss him as much as the other way around, and he's just a boy. Proving she's right, he comes up with a romantic plan, that he's going back to that padock where they nearly smacked on, and she should meet him there, and he knows she will. He hops a lift with a truckie and eventually gets pretty bored inthe paddock. He's right though, cos Carmella does realise he makes her happy and follows him there, but she parks round behind a tree (trees are forcefields: can't see utes behind their foliage) and watches him filling in time by throwing sticks at other sticks, and maybe the ground. Then she goes home. not sure if she realised he is too young for her, or she realised she doesnt like him at all, or if she was unimpressed with Ringo's arm movement, but she scarpered anyway, and I think that's where we are with those 2.
Who's left we haven't spoken about... Oh fkn Sky. She hasn't been in it much, shouldn;t be at all, and was briefly in it tonight as she and Caleb continued to bond and say how much they each meant to each other. What-evaa. Caleb asked Harold's permission to ask her out, which is probably a bit cute, and really spastic, and he pressed all the right buttons, so he's in with Harold. He's finished the Stinger wall but it's night time, so we'll probs see it tomorrow, after their date. I don't care.
I think it was early this week that Paul, buoyed by last week's visit to the local footy with Ned & Mickey, took Harold and Lou with him to a game. The 3 of these guys hanging around is pretty awesome, and it ended with Paul accidentally throwing something, maybe a pie, at a security guard. One by one Lou and Harold stood up for Paul, until all 3 of them were kicked out, in a forgettable but enjoyable enough scene. After Harold's Baby Shower behaviour, he's turning into quite the security risk. I'm actually a bit worried about Harold, and his continuation with the show. We know they're having a massive cast change, and last week ended with the possibility that up to 5 of the mains, and 5 of the best too, migth be going (more on that very soon), and I've talked up my belief that Sky, Boyd and Lou might all be moving on too, but last night Harold mentioned to Lou how he's lonely, and he's still got a thing with Loris whenever she gets back, and if the Timminses are moving to Cairns, and Loris might go with them, it's feasible Harold could go too, presuming Sky's gonna move on as well. FFS, Harold Bishop cannot leave Ramsay Street, he would be very missed. I had a really bad feeling about this last night, just that they might be working up towards that. I guess with the Timmins shock, I've realised nobody is safe, even stalwarts, but throughout all this cast-change I could have sworn that at the very least, Susan, Karl, Harold and Toadie would be safe, being essentially iconic characters that a show can't afford to lose. What, they'll get rid of Toadie to bring in another Taj or Jack? Who? See. But in my heightened state of uncertainty, a few things Harold has said has made me wonder if maybe he's due to fly the coop. Fuck I hope not. He's part of the heart of Neighbours, and although his character is often just taking the piss out of what the character is and played for cheap laughs, or is a nosey annoyance, a lot of the most touching scenes ever can tip from tears-welling-up to total wet cheeks just from the look on Harold's face, and thinking what the old guy's been through. I really really hope he's safe, because if Harold's not, anything could go including the suburb and street. It could end up in Yabby Creek for all we fucking know. *scared*
Not much else on Paul and Elle, in fact I don't remember much at all. They had a bit of interaction with Ned and Mickey staying at their place, and some of the Oliver storyline, but nothing else leaps to mind. Ned and Mickey, menwhile were quiet at the start of the week, but come Wed & Thurs, they were all action go. At least Mickey's bladder was. He wets the bed. Gold. (Not intended pun there, but if you think it's funny, I'll take intention for it.) Paul gets up on Wed morn to find Mickey rinsing his sheets etc in the laundry. "I...errr... split orange juice on them". Good one. Paul, being a good guy, plays along, and tells Mickey he'll do a load of washing, and warns Ned what's happened. New to being a Dad and all, boxhead should still know better than to respond with a groan and threatening "Where is he?", so Paul tells him it's cool, don't embarrass the little tacker, he's probably just stressed. "Stressed? What's he got to be stressed about?" Yeah, good point, new Dad, why the fuck would this kid be unsettled at all? But instead of putting it down to the fact that he's just left his home, his Mum's abandoned him, he's just found out he's got a Dad who's just found out he's got a son, and they've been living at his old home, then a stranger's house, then a hotel, now a stranger's house again within the space of about 3 weeks, and everything the poor kid owns in the world appears to be 2 changes of clothes and a dog, Paul puts it, correctly it turns out, to the fact that Janae's leaving Erinsborough. On Wed night, this was pretty much the first thing we'd heard all week about Friday's ENORMOUS development - that 5 of the main characters (even before Steiger got his well desrved opening credits slot :'( ) are probably moving to Cairns. Until Thurs night it's been a largely Janelle/Steiger/Bree free week, and despite my reasonings last week as to why they couldn;t do it, it's become pretty apparent now that's it's more than likely happening, and really soon, maybe as early as tomorrow night. Ok, I was holding out on these developments, but that's where we've arrived so I'll run through it. On Friday it was suggested that Janelle, Steiger, Janae, Bree and Pepper would move to Cairns to be clsoe to Bree's real family and Anne's kinda one. Also, Dyl's only 90mins away, and the 2 other older Timmins boys, who in one of the show's major tragedies it appears we will now not get to meet, can visit them easier from Brisbane (they're here!!), although as a Brisbanian, I would suggest it's probably closer, cheaper and eaier to visit Melb than Cairns anyway. This was completely out of the blue, and a complete kick in the nuts for anyone who loves the Timminses and thinks that they've rejuvinated the show, making new families who move in not necessarily tryhards and awkwardly acted newcomers, but took the show by storm, and each Timmins made a really fkn great mark - Stinger, then Janelle, Bree, Janae and even Dylan and Kimbo. They are the funnest faimly I've seen on Neighbours, and in honesty, one of the best I've ever seen on tele, piss funny but really close and defensive for each other. I dunno, I love them. Then on Friday last wek is the announcement, hey we've just had one die and anothe leave, why don't we all? And we'll take the pretty great Steigers with us too! So this week we find out Pepper's not going. She's satying (and missing Adam, but not much on that really, except Lou gave her Adam;'s watch he left behind at the General Store), and while she's my 5th favourite out of the 5 suggested leavers, I'm still very glad she's staying. So phew there. The only other one that looks like staying, however, is Janae, because of her burgeoning, still unspoken relationship with Ned, and now Mickey. All of a sudden, from last Thursday hoping for Janae's sake she avoids any contact with deadheadned, now she's just gotta fall for the adorable lunk, she just HAS to. If getting with Ned is the only way for Janae to stay, then ok.
New paragraph here just to break things up.
So Mickey's wetting the bed because Janae's leaving. Because Janae and Ned both have to work (garage and... how does he make money?), they take Mickey to childcare, which is being run in the school holidays by Pepper, conveniently enough. It's here that Mickey draws a coupla of great pictures. The first one we don't really see is of his dog Jake peeing on a tree. Pepper really likes it, but then so do a gang of 90cm tall bullies. They want to see the picture of Jake peeing on the tree, and who wouldn't, but they rip it, and Mickey gets upset. So upset, in fact, that he pisses his dacks again. When Ned gets there, he's outraged, and seriously wants to know which little kid made him do it, and is about to go the little twerp. Honestly, he wants to bash a kid. Fuckhead. Then the kid's Dad steps in, all tatts and attitude and sleeveless flannie, and I could smell the cigarette and VB from my loungeroom. Although could have just been my hott gf. Anyways, Ned decides it's better to blue him instead, but thanksfully Janae's there to calm him down and tell him he's stupid. They are for all purposes a functioning couple, but Ned's got to tell her that before she leaves for Cairns with the rest of her awesome family who should not for any reason be going. Especially Bree. That's fucked. Anyway, in keeping with this blog's briefness, Mickey gives Janae a picture he drew, not of a urinating dog, but of Janae and a house and maybe him, I dunno, but it has written on it DONT GO JANAY I LOVE YOU AND I WILL MISS YOU XXX or something as adorable, and Mickey is definitely a good choice for a cute kid you wouldn't want to just ship off to Boystown or something, and Janae gets to thinking... That's a good sign.
That was all last night. Tonight (Thurs) was finally the big boxing match between Janae and the ugly girl who tried to get Janae to not fight a few weeks ago, cos it was set up so the other girl would win, although in that case why did she want her opposition to stand down? Not sure. Anyways, Janae's in blue, Killer's in red, and they fight. Ned's in her corner, and Janelle, Stegier, Bree and Sky are all there to cheer her on. "Just jab in the first round" Ned warns Janae. She does, and is doing well, and then she doesn't, and she doesn't do well, and gets knocked down. The ref, who could also be a leprecaun, I'm not sure about that, announces in his funny highpitched midgetesque voice 1,2,3,4... and Janelle's screaming for Ned to throw in the towel, but Janae gets back up and scuffles around some more. I find boxing matches very boring, and even though it;s Janae tonight, I still kinda don't care, but baically, she ends up diopng really well, and the decision has to come down to points. Killer wins, but everyone agrees Janae did really well, and Ned tells her she's awesome. She says he's alright too. They still don't get together. Paul's been counselling Ned to tell Janae how he feels ever since the move announcement, and Steiger's been having a word in Janae's ear about the same thing, although she still hasn't admitted how she feels, and even though earlier in the episode Mickey pleaded with her not to go, and Ned dropped hints he wants her to stay, things are still unsaid.
Harold's played a bit of a role also in the Timmins thing, knowing Loris's secret about swapping Anne and Bree as babies, and struggling with whether he should tell them or not. Sky rants on about something that I don't listen to, and he goes around to return a pasta bake dish, and maybe tell them, he;s still unsure. However, by this stage (still pre-boxing) Anne has already come clean to Bree and Janae, and they've taken it pretty well really. They corner Harold and tell him not to tell Janelle - she'd never forgive Loris, and she;s happy now for the first time in ages and this would make her not happy, and she deserves to be happy, so don't tell her. Harold agrees to leave it in their capable hands, and maybe for the last time, we have an awesome scene with Janae and Bree just being sisters, talking about something unrelated and serious but hitting each other in the face with the fuzzy sleeves of a fake fur coat (because everyone's packing for the move). It's just sweet and by now I have come to realise that at the very least, Bree is leaving, and my heart's a ltitle bit sore. Steiger also makes me very very sad that he didn't even officially get a regular character status, and Janelle leaving is just bullshit. There was a nice scene with Rachel and Susan on Wed night, Rachel making Bree a memory box with stuff to remember them by, and Susan saying how they'll be right without the Timminses, but things will certainly be quiet, and both of them looking so damn sad. I was very glad that when I was all teared up and my hott gf looked over, she was in a similar state. Losing the Timminses is a sad move.
Anyway, Thursday nigth wraps up after the boxing match, and the Timmins/Steigers are talking about Janae finding a new trainer in Cairns, no offence Stretch, and Ned walks off. Janae then says 'No', adn Janelle says 'Oh, we'll find you a trainer you like, don't worry', and Janae says 'No, I'm not going to Cairns'. Bringing Ned back and putting him and Janae together was the best idea Neighbours ever had. Bless Ned Parker and all of his interesting plots and wonderful personality traits. He's making Janae stay. So much damn <3 for that girl. But no more than for Bree. They keep saying they're going to see how they like Cairns, maybe just for 6 months or somehting, but that's never good news in a soapie. I will keep any goodbye episodes for you, James, cos saying goodbye to Bree Timmins is something you shouldn't miss. Definitely one of this decade's finest fictional characters, even though she specifically feels like more than that.
That's us up to date, and I'll try to do dailies again from now on. Sorry for the nothing, nothing, nothing, TOO MUCH, approach.
Tom, as in Karl's Dad, not Susan's priestbossloverprick, has been a focus of this week. You'll remember he's got the dementias, and is pretty non-lucid most of the time, or at least, not operating in the same dimension as everyone else, as he calls Zeke Karl, thinks he's back on the farm, and it's 1960 or so. He's staying at K&S's place, but there's got to be someone there to look after him at all times, and that's obvioulsy a little hard. Rachel was looking after him earlier this week, but he seemed okay, even quite lucid, realising he was in Karl & Susan's place, that he'd been calling Zeke the wrong name, and that he had dementia and it must be hard on them all. He was 100% with it, so as Rachel spilled her guts about troubles in paradise with her bf (more later) he told her to shuffle next door to work it all out, he was right. She did. He wasn't. Fkn Tom has an argument with Audrey, can't work out how to turn the tele down or off, and goes to make a cuppa, 'cept he makes the old dementia person's #1 folly of putting the electric kettle on the stove. Jeepers. Then he makes the old dementia person's #461 folly of thinking he has to dip the sheep when he's really in the city 40 years later, so he vamooses outta there, and there's obviously a fire. There was talk, with the CHANGE and all, that everything was going to have a makeover, including the sets, so I thought maybe this was gonna be a real house fire that meant the place had to be rebuilt, but I was just being over-paranoid, as all it did was smoke a shitload and blacken the bench a bit. Racehl and Ringo discovered it in time, but Karl went off at Rachel for being irresponsible, which she was, but he was fairly harsh. Anyways, they still had to find Tom, and they did, standing in the middle of the road telling cars to get off his property and yelling "Bloody council!" He was alright, but the decision was made he needs 24 hour attention, and despite Zeke andRachel for some reason saying that they could do it, Karl scouted around and found a nursing home waiting list for his Dad in Eden Hills. The swish part of town. A lot's happening in these scenes without much happening, in that Karl and his Dad's relationship is being explored and explained, and some of the things Tom says to Zeke are hurtful or sweet towards Karl, and it's really well done. Even though he's on a waiting list ("Shouldn't take too long for a spot to come up though" says a hopeful Karl, meaning he's sending his Dad to a home where he's hoping people die pretty regularly) they decided to put on a See You Later Tom In Case You Don't Remember To Not Eat A Electricity Sandwich Or Something party, so a coupla old blokes (Harold & Lou) come over, and they listen to the old 45s, and talk about when the world was simpler and black & white and Tom has a mental trip through history complaining about the current Prime Minister (first Menzies, then, oh no, he's gone isn't he, oh Fraser...) and being a real communist. I didn't remember, but my hott gf did, that Tom was actually a Communist, and this is proved when he's ragging on all the old Liberal PMs, and Rachel says "Yeah, if I was old enough, I'd vote Labor" and Tom tells her to wash her mouth out, it's the red flag for him all the way, and then sings a Communist anthem. Wow. I love the backstories on Neighbours, but that seems really... just a bit weird. So at this stage Tom's still staying with the K-Ks as long as it takes to get him into a closer home, and they might get a nurse in to help.
Frazer & Rosie's wedding is getting closer, and they each have a few things going on too. After Pepper saw his foot tapping along at a wedding dance rehearsal, she did the manic "OMG I saw what happened and if you don't tell Rosie I will" "I'll tell her at the right time"... very reminiscent of the George Brown revelation. Anyways, he told her that his foot had moved a coupla times, in a very straightforward manner, and she was happy, and that was it. They had a few drinks down the Scarlet B... sorry, Charlie's to celebrate, where THORN had overtaken Steph's SEGA bike record again. This THORN just keeps beating her score, but Steph never sees anyone unusual playing it, so what's going on? Steph's accusation that girls can't ride like that, and a bet later, and it's revealed that THORN is in fact Rosie, who used to play the same game in breaks at uni. As a result of winning the bet, Frazer gets $100 off Toadie, and Steph has to dress in leg warmers, leotards etc and sing an '80s power ballad at the wedding. There are a lot of pop culture references here, like a shitload, and Boyd, in his only scene so far this week, thank fuckitty, says "I'll download a list of '80s power ballads off the internet!", cos he doesn;t know any, like a real fkn tosswit. A few names are thrown around, Every Rose Has Its Thorn, I Wanna Know What Love Is, Total Eclipse Of The Heart, and the entire Toto catalogue, but I don't think we know what Steph's settled on. I'm hoping for Suddenly by Angry Anderson - it's worked before. Briefly, the Toad & Steph storyline hasn't gone much anywhere this week - she's still running for council, he;s still heping her, they probably mucked around a bit, but nothing extraordinary.
So Frazer & Rosie are all in love n stuff, but as always, there are familial complications, this time by Rosie's Dad, Rocco, the first Camenitti we ever met, probably about 5 or 6 years ago now. He's still doing time in the big house, but he rings Rosie, who promptly hangs up on him. Frazer's a bit "Hey he's your Dad... and you made me get in contact withmy jerkass parents" so they go and visit him. He wants to walk Rosie down the aisle, and can apply for day release on compassionate grounds - Rosie chucks a spack that he's got some nerve, Frazer talks to him man-to-man, he doesn't think much of Mr Yeates, but eventually F gets R to agree, on the condition that he bahves himself, doesn;t try anything cunning-like. Rosie's sure he's gonna try to escape or something, and it'll be very disappointing if she's wrong. That Rocco is a tricky one.
Earlier in the week there was a bit of focus on Oliver too. Last week I forgot to mention, because that's what you do with Oliver, that Elle had given him the results of the DNA test to see if Alan Napier was his grandad or not, and his parents not really. I think he burned them without looking at them, but Paul saw him burning something, Oliver did his world's-least-convingly-liar act, and later when he did the same act to Elle who was asking about the result, Paul added it all together. So against both Ollie-wollie and good Paul's wishes Elle used the services of one of Paul's old dodgy acquaintances to ask some questions, do some looking around. They got his birth certificate, but it's got his supposed parents' names on there, so they had to have bought/adopted/stolen/whatevered him pretty darn early. Napier's got 2 kids, a son and a daughter, so if he is Napier's grandkid, one of them is his parent. Oliver tracked down the son, who slammed th door in his face, and then reopened it once Oliver hit it hard enough, and then talked to him. I'd be more inclined to talk to someone the less they'd smashed the shit out of my door, but nonetheless. He's not Ollie's dad, but he said his sister could be his Mum. She disappeared for a while around (Oliver's age) years ago and something else, I dunno, but look, she could be it. Except he doesn;t know where she lives, and even if he did, he wouldn;t tell Oliver - she bad news, and she'll only bring you heartache and misery. That sort of thing. So Oliver doesn;'t know where he stands, and we don't really care much.
Onto the next characters, why not Ringo and Carmella. Yep, not Ringo and Rachel. They split up, actually when Rach went next door, leaving Tom to start a fire. Turns out Ringo does have the hotts for Carmella, and guess what? It's mutual!!! OMG! Well kinda. They've been practising dancing together for the wedding, and that's led to a lot of staring in each other's eyes, and this climaxed early in the week when they did a fruit run together. Ringo's fired from her business, but there was some buyer who didn't like the skinny one, so Ringo had to tell them he'd bought the business off her and fired her so they'd give the company heaps of money. Therefore, for the delivery, it had to be Ringo driving, with Carmella, in the car cos he's on his Ls, hiding ingeniously under a blanket in the front seat of the ute, peeking out to see what was going on, which of course you'd have to if there was a fruit-for-money transaction going on. I mean who wouldn't want to see that?! It all goes well, the ute is parked in the front yard of this Carmella-hating buyer's farm or whatever, and then there's one of the worst conceived premises in recent history - before they drive off, they're taking about dancing, and so Ringo drags her out of the car and they have a waltz. In the field. Next to the ute. The same ute that only a minute ago Carmella had to hide under a blanket in. Now the people who hate Carmella are probably looking out their window saying "WTF? There's that bitch we won't buy fruit off, dancing with the bloke who sacked her and took all our fruit money, in our front yard! WTF is happening?!?" As anyone who's seen popular culture before knows, spontaneous dancing always leads to gazing into each others' eyes, and an admittance that they <3 each other. That doesn't happen here, at least not yet, and that might have more to do with Ringo's amazingly zitty complexion than anything. Wow, he's very spotty indeed, even with the obvious makeup. His zits aren't just red n white dots, they're very bumpy too, so the term Crater Face doesn't apply so much as Olgas Face. Anyways, Carmella doesn't feel like Ringo, so after coming very close to some liptimacy (intimacy of the lips, new word I'm trying out) she does the brush off and they drive home. Ringo dumps Rachel and confronts Carmella about it later, but she denies that she wanted to kiss him as much as the other way around, and he's just a boy. Proving she's right, he comes up with a romantic plan, that he's going back to that padock where they nearly smacked on, and she should meet him there, and he knows she will. He hops a lift with a truckie and eventually gets pretty bored inthe paddock. He's right though, cos Carmella does realise he makes her happy and follows him there, but she parks round behind a tree (trees are forcefields: can't see utes behind their foliage) and watches him filling in time by throwing sticks at other sticks, and maybe the ground. Then she goes home. not sure if she realised he is too young for her, or she realised she doesnt like him at all, or if she was unimpressed with Ringo's arm movement, but she scarpered anyway, and I think that's where we are with those 2.
Who's left we haven't spoken about... Oh fkn Sky. She hasn't been in it much, shouldn;t be at all, and was briefly in it tonight as she and Caleb continued to bond and say how much they each meant to each other. What-evaa. Caleb asked Harold's permission to ask her out, which is probably a bit cute, and really spastic, and he pressed all the right buttons, so he's in with Harold. He's finished the Stinger wall but it's night time, so we'll probs see it tomorrow, after their date. I don't care.
I think it was early this week that Paul, buoyed by last week's visit to the local footy with Ned & Mickey, took Harold and Lou with him to a game. The 3 of these guys hanging around is pretty awesome, and it ended with Paul accidentally throwing something, maybe a pie, at a security guard. One by one Lou and Harold stood up for Paul, until all 3 of them were kicked out, in a forgettable but enjoyable enough scene. After Harold's Baby Shower behaviour, he's turning into quite the security risk. I'm actually a bit worried about Harold, and his continuation with the show. We know they're having a massive cast change, and last week ended with the possibility that up to 5 of the mains, and 5 of the best too, migth be going (more on that very soon), and I've talked up my belief that Sky, Boyd and Lou might all be moving on too, but last night Harold mentioned to Lou how he's lonely, and he's still got a thing with Loris whenever she gets back, and if the Timminses are moving to Cairns, and Loris might go with them, it's feasible Harold could go too, presuming Sky's gonna move on as well. FFS, Harold Bishop cannot leave Ramsay Street, he would be very missed. I had a really bad feeling about this last night, just that they might be working up towards that. I guess with the Timmins shock, I've realised nobody is safe, even stalwarts, but throughout all this cast-change I could have sworn that at the very least, Susan, Karl, Harold and Toadie would be safe, being essentially iconic characters that a show can't afford to lose. What, they'll get rid of Toadie to bring in another Taj or Jack? Who? See. But in my heightened state of uncertainty, a few things Harold has said has made me wonder if maybe he's due to fly the coop. Fuck I hope not. He's part of the heart of Neighbours, and although his character is often just taking the piss out of what the character is and played for cheap laughs, or is a nosey annoyance, a lot of the most touching scenes ever can tip from tears-welling-up to total wet cheeks just from the look on Harold's face, and thinking what the old guy's been through. I really really hope he's safe, because if Harold's not, anything could go including the suburb and street. It could end up in Yabby Creek for all we fucking know. *scared*
Not much else on Paul and Elle, in fact I don't remember much at all. They had a bit of interaction with Ned and Mickey staying at their place, and some of the Oliver storyline, but nothing else leaps to mind. Ned and Mickey, menwhile were quiet at the start of the week, but come Wed & Thurs, they were all action go. At least Mickey's bladder was. He wets the bed. Gold. (Not intended pun there, but if you think it's funny, I'll take intention for it.) Paul gets up on Wed morn to find Mickey rinsing his sheets etc in the laundry. "I...errr... split orange juice on them". Good one. Paul, being a good guy, plays along, and tells Mickey he'll do a load of washing, and warns Ned what's happened. New to being a Dad and all, boxhead should still know better than to respond with a groan and threatening "Where is he?", so Paul tells him it's cool, don't embarrass the little tacker, he's probably just stressed. "Stressed? What's he got to be stressed about?" Yeah, good point, new Dad, why the fuck would this kid be unsettled at all? But instead of putting it down to the fact that he's just left his home, his Mum's abandoned him, he's just found out he's got a Dad who's just found out he's got a son, and they've been living at his old home, then a stranger's house, then a hotel, now a stranger's house again within the space of about 3 weeks, and everything the poor kid owns in the world appears to be 2 changes of clothes and a dog, Paul puts it, correctly it turns out, to the fact that Janae's leaving Erinsborough. On Wed night, this was pretty much the first thing we'd heard all week about Friday's ENORMOUS development - that 5 of the main characters (even before Steiger got his well desrved opening credits slot :'( ) are probably moving to Cairns. Until Thurs night it's been a largely Janelle/Steiger/Bree free week, and despite my reasonings last week as to why they couldn;t do it, it's become pretty apparent now that's it's more than likely happening, and really soon, maybe as early as tomorrow night. Ok, I was holding out on these developments, but that's where we've arrived so I'll run through it. On Friday it was suggested that Janelle, Steiger, Janae, Bree and Pepper would move to Cairns to be clsoe to Bree's real family and Anne's kinda one. Also, Dyl's only 90mins away, and the 2 other older Timmins boys, who in one of the show's major tragedies it appears we will now not get to meet, can visit them easier from Brisbane (they're here!!), although as a Brisbanian, I would suggest it's probably closer, cheaper and eaier to visit Melb than Cairns anyway. This was completely out of the blue, and a complete kick in the nuts for anyone who loves the Timminses and thinks that they've rejuvinated the show, making new families who move in not necessarily tryhards and awkwardly acted newcomers, but took the show by storm, and each Timmins made a really fkn great mark - Stinger, then Janelle, Bree, Janae and even Dylan and Kimbo. They are the funnest faimly I've seen on Neighbours, and in honesty, one of the best I've ever seen on tele, piss funny but really close and defensive for each other. I dunno, I love them. Then on Friday last wek is the announcement, hey we've just had one die and anothe leave, why don't we all? And we'll take the pretty great Steigers with us too! So this week we find out Pepper's not going. She's satying (and missing Adam, but not much on that really, except Lou gave her Adam;'s watch he left behind at the General Store), and while she's my 5th favourite out of the 5 suggested leavers, I'm still very glad she's staying. So phew there. The only other one that looks like staying, however, is Janae, because of her burgeoning, still unspoken relationship with Ned, and now Mickey. All of a sudden, from last Thursday hoping for Janae's sake she avoids any contact with deadheadned, now she's just gotta fall for the adorable lunk, she just HAS to. If getting with Ned is the only way for Janae to stay, then ok.
New paragraph here just to break things up.
So Mickey's wetting the bed because Janae's leaving. Because Janae and Ned both have to work (garage and... how does he make money?), they take Mickey to childcare, which is being run in the school holidays by Pepper, conveniently enough. It's here that Mickey draws a coupla of great pictures. The first one we don't really see is of his dog Jake peeing on a tree. Pepper really likes it, but then so do a gang of 90cm tall bullies. They want to see the picture of Jake peeing on the tree, and who wouldn't, but they rip it, and Mickey gets upset. So upset, in fact, that he pisses his dacks again. When Ned gets there, he's outraged, and seriously wants to know which little kid made him do it, and is about to go the little twerp. Honestly, he wants to bash a kid. Fuckhead. Then the kid's Dad steps in, all tatts and attitude and sleeveless flannie, and I could smell the cigarette and VB from my loungeroom. Although could have just been my hott gf. Anyways, Ned decides it's better to blue him instead, but thanksfully Janae's there to calm him down and tell him he's stupid. They are for all purposes a functioning couple, but Ned's got to tell her that before she leaves for Cairns with the rest of her awesome family who should not for any reason be going. Especially Bree. That's fucked. Anyway, in keeping with this blog's briefness, Mickey gives Janae a picture he drew, not of a urinating dog, but of Janae and a house and maybe him, I dunno, but it has written on it DONT GO JANAY I LOVE YOU AND I WILL MISS YOU XXX or something as adorable, and Mickey is definitely a good choice for a cute kid you wouldn't want to just ship off to Boystown or something, and Janae gets to thinking... That's a good sign.
That was all last night. Tonight (Thurs) was finally the big boxing match between Janae and the ugly girl who tried to get Janae to not fight a few weeks ago, cos it was set up so the other girl would win, although in that case why did she want her opposition to stand down? Not sure. Anyways, Janae's in blue, Killer's in red, and they fight. Ned's in her corner, and Janelle, Stegier, Bree and Sky are all there to cheer her on. "Just jab in the first round" Ned warns Janae. She does, and is doing well, and then she doesn't, and she doesn't do well, and gets knocked down. The ref, who could also be a leprecaun, I'm not sure about that, announces in his funny highpitched midgetesque voice 1,2,3,4... and Janelle's screaming for Ned to throw in the towel, but Janae gets back up and scuffles around some more. I find boxing matches very boring, and even though it;s Janae tonight, I still kinda don't care, but baically, she ends up diopng really well, and the decision has to come down to points. Killer wins, but everyone agrees Janae did really well, and Ned tells her she's awesome. She says he's alright too. They still don't get together. Paul's been counselling Ned to tell Janae how he feels ever since the move announcement, and Steiger's been having a word in Janae's ear about the same thing, although she still hasn't admitted how she feels, and even though earlier in the episode Mickey pleaded with her not to go, and Ned dropped hints he wants her to stay, things are still unsaid.
Harold's played a bit of a role also in the Timmins thing, knowing Loris's secret about swapping Anne and Bree as babies, and struggling with whether he should tell them or not. Sky rants on about something that I don't listen to, and he goes around to return a pasta bake dish, and maybe tell them, he;s still unsure. However, by this stage (still pre-boxing) Anne has already come clean to Bree and Janae, and they've taken it pretty well really. They corner Harold and tell him not to tell Janelle - she'd never forgive Loris, and she;s happy now for the first time in ages and this would make her not happy, and she deserves to be happy, so don't tell her. Harold agrees to leave it in their capable hands, and maybe for the last time, we have an awesome scene with Janae and Bree just being sisters, talking about something unrelated and serious but hitting each other in the face with the fuzzy sleeves of a fake fur coat (because everyone's packing for the move). It's just sweet and by now I have come to realise that at the very least, Bree is leaving, and my heart's a ltitle bit sore. Steiger also makes me very very sad that he didn't even officially get a regular character status, and Janelle leaving is just bullshit. There was a nice scene with Rachel and Susan on Wed night, Rachel making Bree a memory box with stuff to remember them by, and Susan saying how they'll be right without the Timminses, but things will certainly be quiet, and both of them looking so damn sad. I was very glad that when I was all teared up and my hott gf looked over, she was in a similar state. Losing the Timminses is a sad move.
Anyway, Thursday nigth wraps up after the boxing match, and the Timmins/Steigers are talking about Janae finding a new trainer in Cairns, no offence Stretch, and Ned walks off. Janae then says 'No', adn Janelle says 'Oh, we'll find you a trainer you like, don't worry', and Janae says 'No, I'm not going to Cairns'. Bringing Ned back and putting him and Janae together was the best idea Neighbours ever had. Bless Ned Parker and all of his interesting plots and wonderful personality traits. He's making Janae stay. So much damn <3 for that girl. But no more than for Bree. They keep saying they're going to see how they like Cairns, maybe just for 6 months or somehting, but that's never good news in a soapie. I will keep any goodbye episodes for you, James, cos saying goodbye to Bree Timmins is something you shouldn't miss. Definitely one of this decade's finest fictional characters, even though she specifically feels like more than that.
That's us up to date, and I'll try to do dailies again from now on. Sorry for the nothing, nothing, nothing, TOO MUCH, approach.
Saturday 7 July 2007
So... some pretty big news last night, hey? Missing blind swapped-at-birth Timmins Anne made a surprise reappearance, and then we met Anne's Dad/Bree's irl Dad for the first time, Greg Baxter. And some other stuff, but this is really all anyone's thinking about. So what's going to happen now? To be a bit spoilerish, a fucking heap. Let's run through it together now, shall we?
Turns out it's not so much that Greg Baxter is a prick, and that's why he's always gone to huge lengths to keep Anne away from the Timminses and himself away from Anne; he's just a bit of a social retard. Janelle invites him in for a chat and a cuppa and to meet Bree, and he's very uncomfortable with the whole thing, but comes in anyways, at least to grab Anne. But by the time they get to the kitchen, the two adoptotwerps have scarpered out the back door and snuck over to No. 30 where they're talking to Rosie. *sigh* Lucky things. Later developments pushed everything else out of my head, but I think they were just talking about what to do, and Rosie, yeah it's coming back now, was saying something like Anne's Dad only does this because he doesn't want to lose her, or something. She also said she'd do some legal research to see if Anne's got the right to choose who to live with etc. The main point of this scene was to get them out of the house so Janelle, Greg and just-got-home Steiger could talk more, and they do, about how much Janelle loves both of the girls, and how Greg and his wife have a fragile marriage at the moment, all stemming from the stress of finding out about the Bree-Anne whoospie, so if they could all just please forget this ever happened and leave, he'd be much obliged. Jerk, sure, but more a scared one than an out'n'out arsewipe.
I forget the sequence of what conversations happen next, but it's something like this. Rosie heads over to Janelle's just to let her know where the kids are. They come back anyway, and Rosie pops off to have a bridesmaid's fitting or something, more (but not much more) on that later. Maybe only Anne walks in though, cos her Dad tells her that they have to leave now to catch the plane, and why does she have to be so difficult, and doesn't she know what she's doing to her mother etc, and Anne digs the ole Timmins heels in and says she's not going, Janelle's her mum too you know... Greg finally relents and says he'll put off the flight til later this arvo, but she's coming home to Cairns then. Janelle virtually smothers Anne with hugs, again. Meanwhile, Bree's been listening at the door to Greg explain that the stress of meeting Bree would be too much, and they already have a daughter, Anne, and I'm sure I'm not doing it justice, but just to see Bree feeling so hurt, her irl Dad saying he doesn't even want to meet her, and her trembly lip, oh man, that was a cry. I was already close to tears at the start of the episode, with the realisation that her Dad coming back might mean they'll do a daughter swap or something, and Bree might be leaving. With all the talk of cast-do-overs for the CHANGE, there's some I've been expecting to go (Sky, Boyd, Lolly, probs Lou, Oliver, Ned [nuh-uh]) but almost everyone else (except maybe for Paul & Elle - I could picture them feasibly going) would be off limits I woulda thought. But with her Dad back, I started thinking maybe it was Bree's exit, and if they even consider that, that's just fucked. Bree Timmins is one of the, possibly THE, best damn characters on the show, and instead of relegating her to the sidelines, and then shoving her off, she should be made more of a centrepiece for more plots, and develop stronger bonds with other characters, like the unlikely but beautiful chat sequence she had with Karl a few weeks ago. So no touching our Bree, ok CHANGErs? But I'm getting ahead of myself, since this is all purely speculation on my part, no matter how impassioned. So she's lsitenign at the door, crying, and then hears Mr Baxter coming for the door, so she runs.
Turns out she runs for the Scarlet Bar, now Charlie's, but as soon as she walks through the front door, against the very very brown interior, she spots Daddy Baxter who must have driven down here. Frazer and Oliver are having a conversation about relationship stuff, I dunno, so she slides in next to them and asks for sanctuary. Too late, Greg comes over and introduces himself, and asks Bree to come join him. I guess with the pressure of having everyone there off him, he apologises to Bree for shoving her, but gives the rocky marriage excuse. They get talking, he says he saw her on Rove, they're both currently reading that book written from the point of view of the autistic boy, The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night or something, great book anyway, and they bond. He comes off a bit like Alex Kinski, so maybe the writers can only do one kind of well-read reasonably-academic middle-aged man, but his and Bree's time is sweet. But he doesn't back down on his decision about not being part of her life.
Bree runs back home, has a bit of a cry about "What's wrong with me?", Janelle fumes and Greg turns up at the door, saying he's a dickhead, and of course he'd like to get to know Bree. He calls the missus and tells her to harden the fuck up, Bree's gonna come stay with them for a little while. Oh no. She's not... But then Janelle and Greg start talking about how they're gonna organise visits for the girls. If they swap every school holidays, they'll never see each other. They could do combined alternative holidays, but then each parent will only see the other one twice a year, and Greg's not willing to compromise to the proposed 3-1 holidays rule. Hmmm, what to do. Wait a minute, Steiger's got an idea, and it's at this point that, as much as I love him, I wish he'd never come back. Why, he suggests, simultaneously breaking my heart, doesn't the whole Timmins family move up to Cairns? Janelle, Bree, and Janae, and Steiger will come too! Good weather, there's nothing keeping them here, and they'll all be closer to Dylan too. Also, Janelle's 2 other boys are up that way as well, so it's a perfect situation. But wait, says Janelle, you've forgotten Pepper. Oh no I haven't, she's had a rough trot lately, she can have a fresh start too! FUCK YOU FUCKING ALL! The folks there (Steiger, Janelle and Bree) are all a bit keen on it, and Steigs runs off to ask Pepper. Oh no you don't. If this happens, if the family-based idea is to get rid of the Timmins and Stegier families completely, then you can get fucking stuffed, new and improved Neighbours. Talk about throwing away your trump card. Good lord, it's just a stupid idea. N ofamily on this show is closer, more of a family unit, than the Timminses. But more in a minute on why I don't think they'll do it. Just have to clean up the rest of the episode first...
The only other stuff going on, I dunno, there's probably some other Steph or Sky stuff, but Rosie's having her wedding fittings, with a rehearsal coming up, and Oliver's no longer dancing with Carmella, so Ringo has to, and he thnks it'll make Rachel jealous, but she's being les of a control freak, so she doesn't let it. At the fitting, Pepper's having post-Adam spazattack and crying and being a really self-absorbed crybaby, to the point where she can't even try on the dress, cos she's too upset. Whatever. This is when Steiger finds her, obvioulsy not in the best frame of mind, and puts the moving away idea to her. Not sure what she thinks.
Janae's the only othe one not yet to know, and my strongest hope that it won't happen. Hope #1) They've started publicity for this Ned + Janae romance that still hasn't progressed as far as sitting in a tree, but they're definitely acting like a couple, and feels like they're setting it up to be a big romance, so why do all that if she's just going to leave.
Hope #2) We've heard dropped hints for ages now, since Janelle's birthday party, and then straight away at Stinger's funeral, about the 2 older Timmins boys, so I've been waiting for them to make up the Timmins numbers, so I don't think they'll leave without introducing them.
Hope #3) This Anne-Bree setup has been coming for forever, and one of the big drawn-out storylines, so I honestly doubt that the big conclusion of ti all is "Ooh, found them, let's all move there". Setups like that happen to introduce people or plots, not just whisk the family away.
Hope #4) Although Adam's left Erinsborough for now, the way he was introduced make it very likely he'll be back as a new cast member, and I doubt they'd do that without Pepper there for him. I don't think she's going. And therefore, if she's not, Stegier won't be, cos of the family focus.
Hope #5) Bree and Janelle have had very very quiet roles of late, and I don't tihnk that's fitting of a send off of major characters. Normally they give them a last hurrah, like at least reminding viewers of why they loved them in the first place. They did it with Stinger, with that crazy (and ultimately really bad) cross-dressing thing with Sky, like a throwback to his better days, and I think they might do it with Lou too. But to just dump this scenario on us outta nowhere, esp when both Bree and Janelle have had noticeably quiet roles, indicates to me that they're not going, and this suggestion is just to arouse conversation and shock. It's doing an ok job of that.
All pretty weak arguments, but the more I think about it, the more I think there might be a 30% chance that they're all going, but overwhelmingly, I think they're staying. Maybe the Baxters will move dwn, that's true, I hope so, for Bree's sake, but the whole gang moving to Cairns? And Pepper going up there with Steiger, Janelle, Bree and Janae? Don't think so. Also, what goth/indie-girl would move from Melbourne to Cairns? Sheesh.
Big big big suggestions in the episode. Have to wait to see what happens. Holy smokes.
Turns out it's not so much that Greg Baxter is a prick, and that's why he's always gone to huge lengths to keep Anne away from the Timminses and himself away from Anne; he's just a bit of a social retard. Janelle invites him in for a chat and a cuppa and to meet Bree, and he's very uncomfortable with the whole thing, but comes in anyways, at least to grab Anne. But by the time they get to the kitchen, the two adoptotwerps have scarpered out the back door and snuck over to No. 30 where they're talking to Rosie. *sigh* Lucky things. Later developments pushed everything else out of my head, but I think they were just talking about what to do, and Rosie, yeah it's coming back now, was saying something like Anne's Dad only does this because he doesn't want to lose her, or something. She also said she'd do some legal research to see if Anne's got the right to choose who to live with etc. The main point of this scene was to get them out of the house so Janelle, Greg and just-got-home Steiger could talk more, and they do, about how much Janelle loves both of the girls, and how Greg and his wife have a fragile marriage at the moment, all stemming from the stress of finding out about the Bree-Anne whoospie, so if they could all just please forget this ever happened and leave, he'd be much obliged. Jerk, sure, but more a scared one than an out'n'out arsewipe.
I forget the sequence of what conversations happen next, but it's something like this. Rosie heads over to Janelle's just to let her know where the kids are. They come back anyway, and Rosie pops off to have a bridesmaid's fitting or something, more (but not much more) on that later. Maybe only Anne walks in though, cos her Dad tells her that they have to leave now to catch the plane, and why does she have to be so difficult, and doesn't she know what she's doing to her mother etc, and Anne digs the ole Timmins heels in and says she's not going, Janelle's her mum too you know... Greg finally relents and says he'll put off the flight til later this arvo, but she's coming home to Cairns then. Janelle virtually smothers Anne with hugs, again. Meanwhile, Bree's been listening at the door to Greg explain that the stress of meeting Bree would be too much, and they already have a daughter, Anne, and I'm sure I'm not doing it justice, but just to see Bree feeling so hurt, her irl Dad saying he doesn't even want to meet her, and her trembly lip, oh man, that was a cry. I was already close to tears at the start of the episode, with the realisation that her Dad coming back might mean they'll do a daughter swap or something, and Bree might be leaving. With all the talk of cast-do-overs for the CHANGE, there's some I've been expecting to go (Sky, Boyd, Lolly, probs Lou, Oliver, Ned [nuh-uh]) but almost everyone else (except maybe for Paul & Elle - I could picture them feasibly going) would be off limits I woulda thought. But with her Dad back, I started thinking maybe it was Bree's exit, and if they even consider that, that's just fucked. Bree Timmins is one of the, possibly THE, best damn characters on the show, and instead of relegating her to the sidelines, and then shoving her off, she should be made more of a centrepiece for more plots, and develop stronger bonds with other characters, like the unlikely but beautiful chat sequence she had with Karl a few weeks ago. So no touching our Bree, ok CHANGErs? But I'm getting ahead of myself, since this is all purely speculation on my part, no matter how impassioned. So she's lsitenign at the door, crying, and then hears Mr Baxter coming for the door, so she runs.
Turns out she runs for the Scarlet Bar, now Charlie's, but as soon as she walks through the front door, against the very very brown interior, she spots Daddy Baxter who must have driven down here. Frazer and Oliver are having a conversation about relationship stuff, I dunno, so she slides in next to them and asks for sanctuary. Too late, Greg comes over and introduces himself, and asks Bree to come join him. I guess with the pressure of having everyone there off him, he apologises to Bree for shoving her, but gives the rocky marriage excuse. They get talking, he says he saw her on Rove, they're both currently reading that book written from the point of view of the autistic boy, The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night or something, great book anyway, and they bond. He comes off a bit like Alex Kinski, so maybe the writers can only do one kind of well-read reasonably-academic middle-aged man, but his and Bree's time is sweet. But he doesn't back down on his decision about not being part of her life.
Bree runs back home, has a bit of a cry about "What's wrong with me?", Janelle fumes and Greg turns up at the door, saying he's a dickhead, and of course he'd like to get to know Bree. He calls the missus and tells her to harden the fuck up, Bree's gonna come stay with them for a little while. Oh no. She's not... But then Janelle and Greg start talking about how they're gonna organise visits for the girls. If they swap every school holidays, they'll never see each other. They could do combined alternative holidays, but then each parent will only see the other one twice a year, and Greg's not willing to compromise to the proposed 3-1 holidays rule. Hmmm, what to do. Wait a minute, Steiger's got an idea, and it's at this point that, as much as I love him, I wish he'd never come back. Why, he suggests, simultaneously breaking my heart, doesn't the whole Timmins family move up to Cairns? Janelle, Bree, and Janae, and Steiger will come too! Good weather, there's nothing keeping them here, and they'll all be closer to Dylan too. Also, Janelle's 2 other boys are up that way as well, so it's a perfect situation. But wait, says Janelle, you've forgotten Pepper. Oh no I haven't, she's had a rough trot lately, she can have a fresh start too! FUCK YOU FUCKING ALL! The folks there (Steiger, Janelle and Bree) are all a bit keen on it, and Steigs runs off to ask Pepper. Oh no you don't. If this happens, if the family-based idea is to get rid of the Timmins and Stegier families completely, then you can get fucking stuffed, new and improved Neighbours. Talk about throwing away your trump card. Good lord, it's just a stupid idea. N ofamily on this show is closer, more of a family unit, than the Timminses. But more in a minute on why I don't think they'll do it. Just have to clean up the rest of the episode first...
The only other stuff going on, I dunno, there's probably some other Steph or Sky stuff, but Rosie's having her wedding fittings, with a rehearsal coming up, and Oliver's no longer dancing with Carmella, so Ringo has to, and he thnks it'll make Rachel jealous, but she's being les of a control freak, so she doesn't let it. At the fitting, Pepper's having post-Adam spazattack and crying and being a really self-absorbed crybaby, to the point where she can't even try on the dress, cos she's too upset. Whatever. This is when Steiger finds her, obvioulsy not in the best frame of mind, and puts the moving away idea to her. Not sure what she thinks.
Janae's the only othe one not yet to know, and my strongest hope that it won't happen. Hope #1) They've started publicity for this Ned + Janae romance that still hasn't progressed as far as sitting in a tree, but they're definitely acting like a couple, and feels like they're setting it up to be a big romance, so why do all that if she's just going to leave.
Hope #2) We've heard dropped hints for ages now, since Janelle's birthday party, and then straight away at Stinger's funeral, about the 2 older Timmins boys, so I've been waiting for them to make up the Timmins numbers, so I don't think they'll leave without introducing them.
Hope #3) This Anne-Bree setup has been coming for forever, and one of the big drawn-out storylines, so I honestly doubt that the big conclusion of ti all is "Ooh, found them, let's all move there". Setups like that happen to introduce people or plots, not just whisk the family away.
Hope #4) Although Adam's left Erinsborough for now, the way he was introduced make it very likely he'll be back as a new cast member, and I doubt they'd do that without Pepper there for him. I don't think she's going. And therefore, if she's not, Stegier won't be, cos of the family focus.
Hope #5) Bree and Janelle have had very very quiet roles of late, and I don't tihnk that's fitting of a send off of major characters. Normally they give them a last hurrah, like at least reminding viewers of why they loved them in the first place. They did it with Stinger, with that crazy (and ultimately really bad) cross-dressing thing with Sky, like a throwback to his better days, and I think they might do it with Lou too. But to just dump this scenario on us outta nowhere, esp when both Bree and Janelle have had noticeably quiet roles, indicates to me that they're not going, and this suggestion is just to arouse conversation and shock. It's doing an ok job of that.
All pretty weak arguments, but the more I think about it, the more I think there might be a 30% chance that they're all going, but overwhelmingly, I think they're staying. Maybe the Baxters will move dwn, that's true, I hope so, for Bree's sake, but the whole gang moving to Cairns? And Pepper going up there with Steiger, Janelle, Bree and Janae? Don't think so. Also, what goth/indie-girl would move from Melbourne to Cairns? Sheesh.
Big big big suggestions in the episode. Have to wait to see what happens. Holy smokes.
Friday 6 July 2007
Anne On The Run (Thurs, July 5 '07)
OK, because blogging is thirsty work, and there's been a bit of shit gone down over the past 2 nights, Thurs night's episode is being presented in chat mode. I already told James a bit of what was going down, or at least the most amazing part of the episode, and I happened to be gchatting with our friend Bree at the same time, and she also asked me what happened tonight on Neighbours. So... here's 2 different self-indulgent gchats explaining the biggest plot development tonight. It was a biggie too, just a bit awesome. Other short plot points to follow:
(oh, and James is called Timothy, because like his blog says (see links) "My Name Is Tim But They Call Me James".)
me: Oh man, big shit tonight, do you want the spoiler before i type it up tomorrow?
Timothy: sure
me: well okay, if you're sure...
Timothy: yer
me: Someone came back.
Timothy: !!!!
oh it better me someone i like
me: Anne.
Timothy: holy shit
anne
old anne?
like for ages ago
me: Blind Anne
Timothy: or rebecchi
oh
god
what
wtf is she doing
me: Yeah, Loris found her last week!
Timothy: i kinda know where this is heading
hmm
i hated anne so much
is loris back?
me: But Loris isn't back yet.
Timothy: oh k
me: But everyone's a bit suss as to why Loris would go looking for her and not tell anyone.
Timothy: what was the ersult with anne?
she ran off?
went with her fam
ro what
me: And Sky made Harold tell her on teh provision she wouldn;t say anything, and straight awy she's all "I'm trelling them"
Anne's "on camp" for 6 days, so she's got that long before they get suss
Timothy: sky made harold tell her what
me: But... ep ended with Mr Baxter arriving at the Timmins door "I know she's in there!"
Timothy: loris and harold are friends, so harold was the one that knew?
me: Yah
Timothy: loris stole anne?
me: Loris swapped Anne at birth, you mean?
When she was at the door, I honestly got so excited, P-M pissed herself until the ad break. She said I looked honest to god downs syndrome, way more than when I pretend.
Timothy: no no
why did loris steal anne and take her to the timmins or 'on camp'
like her dad is all like 'where's my anne'
so obviously loris has done something bad
me: Nah, her Dad thought she was on camp, and we don't know how he found out otherwise yet.
Loris has been looking for Anne and the Baxters all this time. Found them up near Cairns I think.
Timothy: so her dad thinks loris stole her from camp
cairns lol
bit hot up there ay
me: Dunno what the Dad thinks
Timothy: bit dry
me: Yeah, bad on the eyes.
Lol she's blind dun't matter!
Timothy: lolololoool
hey anne!!! what's cairns look like?!?!
lol u don't know
burnt!
me: lololol
Timothy: (coz u can't see!!!)
haha
me: Hey Anne have I got something in my eye?
Yeah. MY EYES UNLIKE YOU LOLOL!
Timothy: hahhahahah
hey anne!!!
look! *points*
just kidding!!
hey anne...how's my hair???
oh....don't worry
me: Hey Anne * does rude shit*
That was the other guy!
Timothy: *rapes Anne*
Didn't see it. Didn't happen!
me: LOLLOLOLOLOLing way to ohard
Hey, Anne, how come everyone else is clucking like a chicken and you're not?
Oh cos you can't be hypnotised! Reverse pwn!
Dat pwn been flipt yo
Then the simultaneous Bree chat: (Bree my friend, not Bree Timmins)
me: Sorry, just briefing James on Neighbour tonight.
Ho;ly smokes, good one or what?!?!
bree.devereaux: didn't see it, was at work, have to wait for the blog!
me: ANNE
Anne is back
bree.devereaux: OMG!
me: Blind Anne Tiommins!
bree.devereaux: cool
me: Fkn hell I nearly fell off my seat!!
bree.devereaux: why did she leave in the first place?
me: Her parents took her
bree.devereaux: oh.
i can't remember that much about her, was she evil? his is exciting for bree though.
me: Anne's not evil, no, just blind.
bree.devereaux: oh okay.
i thought she was evil
me: She was trying to work her way into the family and nobody knew why, so she was way creepy, but then we found out she was a Timmins, so it all made sense. But she was still just not a great actor.
bree.devereaux: and not a real timmins!
nurture not nature creates timminses imo
me: She is though. Bre's not!
bree.devereaux: ^^
me: OIC
bree.devereaux: yah
did bree ever meet her bio folks?
me: Not yet.
bree.devereaux: maybe soon!
me: Until tonight, cos the end of the ep is Anne's dad at teh Timmins door "I know she's in there!"
bree.devereaux: oh!
way cool!
can't wait for tomorrow.
me: And Janelle's like "Of course she is, come on in and put yer feet up"
And he's all "Well... I didn't expect... what I meant..."
bree.devereaux: what did he mean?
me: He was just taken aback that they didn't hate him.
So was I a bit.
bree.devereaux: ohhhh
yeah
i would have thought janelle would be hostile.
me: Yeah, but she's got her girl back now, so she wants to find out why Baxter McGaxter is being such a chump.
bree.devereaux: is... is his name really baxter mcgaxter?
me: I'm writing half my blog right now.
It is now.
bree.devereaux: oh good! it was distressing when it was behind.
me: No I'm not actually, but I'm just gonna cut n paste this I think.
Hmmm, that could work.
but what about the other storylines?
me: Yeah yeah righto. I'll get onto them now...
(That's the segue where I'm gonna start talking about Mickey or Adam or someone)
bree.devereaux: good one!
blogging pro!
me: Yeah, applying for the ROyal Academy of Blogging next fall.
bree.devereaux: soon you will be king of the blogoshpere!
me: You say "spear" like Joel from BB.
"shpere"
bree.devereaux: hahahhahahahahahahaahah
ooopsies
lol, though
me: Joel jokes are my favourite. Speech impediments are pretty hilarious.
bree.devereaux: totally
i used to work with a girl who said "free" when she meant "three". hilarious.
me: Oh noes!
And especially wrokign in a shop.
"How many dollars is this junk?"
"Free."
"kthxbye."
bree.devereaux: nah, it used to be
"[person], could you please open on register free, register free!"
me: lol
what a fkn retard.
bree.devereaux: yeah.
me: Imagine if she worked at Grace Brothers in London in teh 70s, every time she'd ask Mrs Slocum if she was free, she'd be all "I'm significantly older my dear"
And then she'd be all "Not free, free!"
bree.devereaux: hahahaha
me: That joke would go for 12 seasons.
bree.devereaux: and would never get old.
I left some funny jokes in because we are funny guys. So yeah, that's the major thing. The title was a bit of a spoiler, but she turned up straight away, but still it was an almighty shock, because the title had put a "Hmmm, I wonder" in my head, and then BAM! She's at the door, and we're gonna find out everything!! So they all bonded, Anne's parents have moved to Cairns and think she's at camp, cos Loris found her, but hasn't come back yet, and only Harold, Anne, and now Sky know why (she's the one who swapped Anne and Bree at birth and is trying to make amends - although I'm not sure what her plan is from here), but Mr Baxter turned up at the end, all hostile, but Janelle just invited him in with a casual "We should have done this a long time ago". VERY intriguing.
Otherwise, hmmm, what else - everything else kinda fades into insignificance. Oh, no there was one other major plot and that's we found out what Adam's story is. Pepper was convinced he was a crim cos he was scared for Steiger in uniform and avoiding him, but tonight he came clean. He actually left her a goodbye note under the door, and we had a voiceover while he packed and got ready to leave town, but by the end of his voiceover, Pepp was over at his door abusing him anyway. The story is he's not a crim, but an ex-UK cop. He made a mistake, left his cop buddy partner (pretty girl in the photo he was looking at last night) alone on a call-out, she got capped, and he's been a wreck ever since - moved to Australia, can't be around cops, overcompensates with symbolic tatts and rippling abs... They talked it all out, he remained determined to leave and not fuck up Pepper's life by bringing her down, and that's exactly what happened - he caught the bus out next morning. Pepper did the lat second race to the bus stop to talk him out of it, but nope, he caught it from opposite Grease Monkeys (although every time we go to his house, they show Melbourne by night shots, like city shots, like we're crossing town and certainly not just popping up the road to Anson's Corner, so in retrospect, why the fuck he'd be catching the Grease Monkeys/Garage bus stop, I have no idea. Anyway, he's left, and Pepper blames her Dad for making her suss. Pepper's dressing skankier than ever, it's not great.
Tom had some more adventures, I can't relaly remember what at this stage, but he's still calling Zeke Karl and showing a lot of affection for him now, a side Karl himself's never seen, so through Zeke, he's getting his Dad's love and respect. Karl's worried it might be too much for the Zekester, but Susan think's it's cool, so we know it is.
I dunno - Mickey and Ned probably. He's still alive and fine. Oh, and part 2 of the Charlie's opening. Steph made another speech (2 in one night?) and was gonna announce she's standing for council, but instead fualted mid-sentence and said she's "standing... here, welcoming you all" or something hokey. he lost her nerve cos Toadie's not being supportive of Steph dong it her way. That's because he's not stupid, and she's very gung ho and would certianly wreck things for herself right now, so he's gonna properly be her campaign manager, even though we already knew that. These scenes were also really full of people dancing terribly, that standard no-music soap dance, and tonight was especially noticeable. Steiger did turn up, K&S were still there, and Lou did a really silly dance that was a bit cringey, but Harold's "Oh.. *smiles*" response was worth it. Lovely.
Finally, there was a bit with Sky and Boyd. He said he doesn;t want to get back with her, but he's trying to feel like he did when they were together, cos he used to be a better person. I think that's true. Sky told him pretty flat out that he has to stop saving people and live his own life, and he was a bit cut and defensive, but he kinda took it on board, so I hope that means, for the 20th time this year, that Boyd will be leaving to start his own life. In Tasmania, on an oil rig, as a crim's offsider, I don't give a toss. Just go.
Good episode.
(oh, and James is called Timothy, because like his blog says (see links) "My Name Is Tim But They Call Me James".)
me: Oh man, big shit tonight, do you want the spoiler before i type it up tomorrow?
Timothy: sure
me: well okay, if you're sure...
Timothy: yer
me: Someone came back.
Timothy: !!!!
oh it better me someone i like
me: Anne.
Timothy: holy shit
anne
old anne?
like for ages ago
me: Blind Anne
Timothy: or rebecchi
oh
god
what
wtf is she doing
me: Yeah, Loris found her last week!
Timothy: i kinda know where this is heading
hmm
i hated anne so much
is loris back?
me: But Loris isn't back yet.
Timothy: oh k
me: But everyone's a bit suss as to why Loris would go looking for her and not tell anyone.
Timothy: what was the ersult with anne?
she ran off?
went with her fam
ro what
me: And Sky made Harold tell her on teh provision she wouldn;t say anything, and straight awy she's all "I'm trelling them"
Anne's "on camp" for 6 days, so she's got that long before they get suss
Timothy: sky made harold tell her what
me: But... ep ended with Mr Baxter arriving at the Timmins door "I know she's in there!"
Timothy: loris and harold are friends, so harold was the one that knew?
me: Yah
Timothy: loris stole anne?
me: Loris swapped Anne at birth, you mean?
When she was at the door, I honestly got so excited, P-M pissed herself until the ad break. She said I looked honest to god downs syndrome, way more than when I pretend.
Timothy: no no
why did loris steal anne and take her to the timmins or 'on camp'
like her dad is all like 'where's my anne'
so obviously loris has done something bad
me: Nah, her Dad thought she was on camp, and we don't know how he found out otherwise yet.
Loris has been looking for Anne and the Baxters all this time. Found them up near Cairns I think.
Timothy: so her dad thinks loris stole her from camp
cairns lol
bit hot up there ay
me: Dunno what the Dad thinks
Timothy: bit dry
me: Yeah, bad on the eyes.
Lol she's blind dun't matter!
Timothy: lolololoool
hey anne!!! what's cairns look like?!?!
lol u don't know
burnt!
me: lololol
Timothy: (coz u can't see!!!)
haha
me: Hey Anne have I got something in my eye?
Yeah. MY EYES UNLIKE YOU LOLOL!
Timothy: hahhahahah
hey anne!!!
look! *points*
just kidding!!
hey anne...how's my hair???
oh....don't worry
me: Hey Anne * does rude shit*
That was the other guy!
Timothy: *rapes Anne*
Didn't see it. Didn't happen!
me: LOLLOLOLOLOLing way to ohard
Hey, Anne, how come everyone else is clucking like a chicken and you're not?
Oh cos you can't be hypnotised! Reverse pwn!
Dat pwn been flipt yo
Then the simultaneous Bree chat: (Bree my friend, not Bree Timmins)
me: Sorry, just briefing James on Neighbour tonight.
Ho;ly smokes, good one or what?!?!
bree.devereaux: didn't see it, was at work, have to wait for the blog!
me: ANNE
Anne is back
bree.devereaux: OMG!
me: Blind Anne Tiommins!
bree.devereaux: cool
me: Fkn hell I nearly fell off my seat!!
bree.devereaux: why did she leave in the first place?
me: Her parents took her
bree.devereaux: oh.
i can't remember that much about her, was she evil? his is exciting for bree though.
me: Anne's not evil, no, just blind.
bree.devereaux: oh okay.
i thought she was evil
me: She was trying to work her way into the family and nobody knew why, so she was way creepy, but then we found out she was a Timmins, so it all made sense. But she was still just not a great actor.
bree.devereaux: and not a real timmins!
nurture not nature creates timminses imo
me: She is though. Bre's not!
bree.devereaux: ^^
me: OIC
bree.devereaux: yah
did bree ever meet her bio folks?
me: Not yet.
bree.devereaux: maybe soon!
me: Until tonight, cos the end of the ep is Anne's dad at teh Timmins door "I know she's in there!"
bree.devereaux: oh!
way cool!
can't wait for tomorrow.
me: And Janelle's like "Of course she is, come on in and put yer feet up"
And he's all "Well... I didn't expect... what I meant..."
bree.devereaux: what did he mean?
me: He was just taken aback that they didn't hate him.
So was I a bit.
bree.devereaux: ohhhh
yeah
i would have thought janelle would be hostile.
me: Yeah, but she's got her girl back now, so she wants to find out why Baxter McGaxter is being such a chump.
bree.devereaux: is... is his name really baxter mcgaxter?
me: I'm writing half my blog right now.
It is now.
bree.devereaux: oh good! it was distressing when it was behind.
me: No I'm not actually, but I'm just gonna cut n paste this I think.
Hmmm, that could work.
but what about the other storylines?
me: Yeah yeah righto. I'll get onto them now...
(That's the segue where I'm gonna start talking about Mickey or Adam or someone)
bree.devereaux: good one!
blogging pro!
me: Yeah, applying for the ROyal Academy of Blogging next fall.
bree.devereaux: soon you will be king of the blogoshpere!
me: You say "spear" like Joel from BB.
"shpere"
bree.devereaux: hahahhahahahahahahaahah
ooopsies
lol, though
me: Joel jokes are my favourite. Speech impediments are pretty hilarious.
bree.devereaux: totally
i used to work with a girl who said "free" when she meant "three". hilarious.
me: Oh noes!
And especially wrokign in a shop.
"How many dollars is this junk?"
"Free."
"kthxbye."
bree.devereaux: nah, it used to be
"[person], could you please open on register free, register free!"
me: lol
what a fkn retard.
bree.devereaux: yeah.
me: Imagine if she worked at Grace Brothers in London in teh 70s, every time she'd ask Mrs Slocum if she was free, she'd be all "I'm significantly older my dear"
And then she'd be all "Not free, free!"
bree.devereaux: hahahaha
me: That joke would go for 12 seasons.
bree.devereaux: and would never get old.
I left some funny jokes in because we are funny guys. So yeah, that's the major thing. The title was a bit of a spoiler, but she turned up straight away, but still it was an almighty shock, because the title had put a "Hmmm, I wonder" in my head, and then BAM! She's at the door, and we're gonna find out everything!! So they all bonded, Anne's parents have moved to Cairns and think she's at camp, cos Loris found her, but hasn't come back yet, and only Harold, Anne, and now Sky know why (she's the one who swapped Anne and Bree at birth and is trying to make amends - although I'm not sure what her plan is from here), but Mr Baxter turned up at the end, all hostile, but Janelle just invited him in with a casual "We should have done this a long time ago". VERY intriguing.
Otherwise, hmmm, what else - everything else kinda fades into insignificance. Oh, no there was one other major plot and that's we found out what Adam's story is. Pepper was convinced he was a crim cos he was scared for Steiger in uniform and avoiding him, but tonight he came clean. He actually left her a goodbye note under the door, and we had a voiceover while he packed and got ready to leave town, but by the end of his voiceover, Pepp was over at his door abusing him anyway. The story is he's not a crim, but an ex-UK cop. He made a mistake, left his cop buddy partner (pretty girl in the photo he was looking at last night) alone on a call-out, she got capped, and he's been a wreck ever since - moved to Australia, can't be around cops, overcompensates with symbolic tatts and rippling abs... They talked it all out, he remained determined to leave and not fuck up Pepper's life by bringing her down, and that's exactly what happened - he caught the bus out next morning. Pepper did the lat second race to the bus stop to talk him out of it, but nope, he caught it from opposite Grease Monkeys (although every time we go to his house, they show Melbourne by night shots, like city shots, like we're crossing town and certainly not just popping up the road to Anson's Corner, so in retrospect, why the fuck he'd be catching the Grease Monkeys/Garage bus stop, I have no idea. Anyway, he's left, and Pepper blames her Dad for making her suss. Pepper's dressing skankier than ever, it's not great.
Tom had some more adventures, I can't relaly remember what at this stage, but he's still calling Zeke Karl and showing a lot of affection for him now, a side Karl himself's never seen, so through Zeke, he's getting his Dad's love and respect. Karl's worried it might be too much for the Zekester, but Susan think's it's cool, so we know it is.
I dunno - Mickey and Ned probably. He's still alive and fine. Oh, and part 2 of the Charlie's opening. Steph made another speech (2 in one night?) and was gonna announce she's standing for council, but instead fualted mid-sentence and said she's "standing... here, welcoming you all" or something hokey. he lost her nerve cos Toadie's not being supportive of Steph dong it her way. That's because he's not stupid, and she's very gung ho and would certianly wreck things for herself right now, so he's gonna properly be her campaign manager, even though we already knew that. These scenes were also really full of people dancing terribly, that standard no-music soap dance, and tonight was especially noticeable. Steiger did turn up, K&S were still there, and Lou did a really silly dance that was a bit cringey, but Harold's "Oh.. *smiles*" response was worth it. Lovely.
Finally, there was a bit with Sky and Boyd. He said he doesn;t want to get back with her, but he's trying to feel like he did when they were together, cos he used to be a better person. I think that's true. Sky told him pretty flat out that he has to stop saving people and live his own life, and he was a bit cut and defensive, but he kinda took it on board, so I hope that means, for the 20th time this year, that Boyd will be leaving to start his own life. In Tasmania, on an oil rig, as a crim's offsider, I don't give a toss. Just go.
Good episode.
Thursday 5 July 2007
Stepping Up To The Fate (Wed, Jul 4 '07)
G'day. No time to lose, cos Mickey's floating in the pool face down and electrified, and Frazer's just stuck staring at the water... WHA' HAPPENED? Ok ok ok ok ok ok, I'll tell you then. First of all, when Rosie flicked the power box, it turned the power off, meaning Mickey was only floating in zapwater for a second, and now is just in normal water. So Frazer's staring, then snaps into gear, yells for MICKEY! MICKEY! and that doesn';t work so he's all ROSIE!!! who's not in the house cos she's out in the driveway looking at a special wedding car that Pepper's got to show her although you'd have to look past Pepper's legs to see it, cos seriously she was wearing what looked like a t-shirt with a belt and boots. Fucking gross. Frazer realises nobody's coming, so, and this was really rad, he kinda took a runup at the side of the pool in his wheelchair, and toppled straight in headfirst, chair and all. I don't care if irl Frazer's legs work or not, that would be pretty scary doing that I think. He's all just WHEEL WHEEL WHEEL WHOOOOOAOAOA SPLASH!!! Then some nifty underwater camera work, and it's a pretty big struggle, and he's got Mickey's face above water, but he's struggling to do the same for himself, and when they come up they're under a Lilo lounge, but eventually he makes his way to the side fo teh pool and starts on the mouth to mouth. Rosie comes down the backstairs absent-mindedly talking about wedding cars, and Frazer yells at her to get an ambulance, and we cut to Ned & Janae at the garage.
These guys are so damn couply. He's training her as she puts her sports bra to the ultimate test, doing a boobs-close-to-camera skipping routine, and for someone pretty well-breasted, they don't move much more than she does. Good sports bra. It's just yada talk, mainly about the fact Ned's still hopeless & hasn't worked out how to tell Mickey he's his Dad, while Janae's got the decent advice: "4 words. I am your dad." They leave the garage for a jog home, leaving some random dude working on a car in the background, although I wasn't aware there were other workers other than Janae and the long-missing Chris Steiger, so hope to learn more there. Obviously they get home just in time for the ambo, and both here and at the hospital when they arrive, Ned reverts really quickly into the blaming parent role. "Frazer was supposed to be looking after him!" "Where's his mum?" I don't have kids (and if my Grade 10 formal root turns up with a surprise kid I sired that night, my Mickey will be 15 by now, and also have my right hand as his mum, so I doubt it strongly) but I hope if/when I do I don't lose my power of apportioning blame like so many parents do. "Why did the guy who warned him not to do the dangerous thing and then saved his life let this happen?" I hope to be able to maintain the concepts of accidents and self-blame, but the overwhelming desire to be an obnoxious parent takes over Ned, but everyone's too busy hero-worshipping Frazer to notice, and rightly so.
He's trying to work out how he did it, and he has a flashback to the pool, and thinks he can remember pushing up from the bottom of the pool with his leg. Or did he? He's not so sure, but at this stage he's in the loungeroom in his dried chair and looks down to his feet, and... he can wiggle a coupla toes. For someone who wears crips suits most of the time, it's a convenient time for him to be wearing thongs. Frazer gets a look on his face, kinda like HOLY SMOKES and kinda like DON'T GET TOO EXCITED YET, and doesn't mention anything to Rosie. He does, however, tell her that he was thinking of his Mum and Paul when he was looking at Mickey, and he can't be responsible for another drowned kid, and Rosie hugged him and said "Oh, your dead brother" to fill in the gaps for anyone who hasn't been reading this blog. Two things here to save time, cos they were spaced out a bit - 1) over the course of the episode, Frazer does the whole "I think my legs are kinda working again" look a few times, and it's a sweet little-kid-with-big-eyes type thing, but he doesn't disclose to anyone what he's thinking. In fact, in a scene later on when they're at (**BLOG SPOILER**) the grand reopening of the new no-longer-Scarlet Bar, Toadie spills a tray of hot snacks over his legs, and Frazer jokes that it's not like he could feel it anyway, although his "Mmmmmft" face said different. And 2) Mickey's fine.
Everyone in Erinsborough must have heard about Mickey, although Susan and Janae are the only ones who know why Ned's even got the kid. Toadie assumes it's his nephew or something (also Stu's nephew then, silly?) and Karl goes on a bit of a "Where's his parents, the poor kid's in hospital" til Susan shushes him with a couple of her "Not now Karl"s. But Mickey's fine, sitting up, calling for his Mum, and then being generally pretty happy with Ned instead. It's all computer games and hangin out having fun until closing time when the nurse says they gotta vamoose. "Immediate family only" "But he's got noone else..." *You fucking dimwit* "Immediate family only." "Just a little longer?" *You fucking dimwit* "Look I don't make the rules. No touching!" *you fucking fucking fucking dimwit* "...I'm his Dad." The nurse is easily convinced, Toad & Steph who are there do a coupla OMGs (and Toadie makes THE most stupid face, like a sneaky eyes, then a O rly? and it's fantastic) and it takes a bit longer for Mickey, but he's pretty happy with the outcome, so that's all cool. Can't remember if this went any further than the usual "How come you weren't there when I was a kid?" shit, so onto the next plot thanks.
That'd be the relaunch of the Scarlet Bar then. Steph and Toad spend the arvo getting it ready, and there's shit a shitload of work going on, but by the evening everything scrubbed up fine, although nobody except Steph know what it's gonna be called. It's got a brown look to it, maybe a bit like the inside of a log cabin, and it's pretty swish, with the only real cosmetic part left over from the old bar being the SEGA motorbike game. They mention this a few times tonight, including still wondering who the top scoring THORN is, so that marathon-length plot hasn't been forgotten, just stretched out to 10x its recommended stretching point. I must admit though, the intrigue is building. Who could it be? Why is it taking so long to find out? WHO IS IT?? Anyways, Steph's all nervous nelly about the reopening, and there's a bit of talk with Toadie about her image for politics, but not much, and a lot of the folks are there for the big do. It's pretty much people chatting, and I'm streaming past all this now cos it's almost time to go home, but it's just people milling around, eating eats, drinking drinks, and then Steph makes a speech thanking everyone. "I hope this place becomes the third place in your life, like home, and work, and here, where you can come for a drink or a chat or even just to read a book." Sounds like the Alibi Room kinda did before you had to fight Andrew G for a chair. And with that, she unveils teh new name for the place: CHARLIE'S. Righto. Not a lot of thought put in there, but that's it. k. Everyting went well and everyone had a lovely time.
Except Adam. He was gonna be there at the opening, but instead pulled the world's most obvious u-turn. Steph: "You gonna be here tonight Adam?" "Wouldn't miss it for the world." "Oh good, you can get to know my Dad better", says Pepp. "Ooh, I just remembered, right now, that I've got a physio appt tonight. My shoulder's been killing me. For a coupla days. Byes!" Hmmm, thinks Pepp, so durnig the unveiling she hightails it to Adam's place where she was right to suspect he didn't have a suddenly days-old shoulder injury. As she knocks on the door, he's sitting on the couch staring at a photo of a bit of a hottie, which he puts away. She gives him the "For someone who's so against lying you do a lot of it" offence, and he admits that he didn't want to go when he heard about her Dad being there (even though he wasn't) but it's not what she thinks. Something to do with the photo girl he's eyeing off probably, but who is she? What does he mean? Is he telling the truth? So many questions. I think it's time to go home, find out some answers. Bye.
These guys are so damn couply. He's training her as she puts her sports bra to the ultimate test, doing a boobs-close-to-camera skipping routine, and for someone pretty well-breasted, they don't move much more than she does. Good sports bra. It's just yada talk, mainly about the fact Ned's still hopeless & hasn't worked out how to tell Mickey he's his Dad, while Janae's got the decent advice: "4 words. I am your dad." They leave the garage for a jog home, leaving some random dude working on a car in the background, although I wasn't aware there were other workers other than Janae and the long-missing Chris Steiger, so hope to learn more there. Obviously they get home just in time for the ambo, and both here and at the hospital when they arrive, Ned reverts really quickly into the blaming parent role. "Frazer was supposed to be looking after him!" "Where's his mum?" I don't have kids (and if my Grade 10 formal root turns up with a surprise kid I sired that night, my Mickey will be 15 by now, and also have my right hand as his mum, so I doubt it strongly) but I hope if/when I do I don't lose my power of apportioning blame like so many parents do. "Why did the guy who warned him not to do the dangerous thing and then saved his life let this happen?" I hope to be able to maintain the concepts of accidents and self-blame, but the overwhelming desire to be an obnoxious parent takes over Ned, but everyone's too busy hero-worshipping Frazer to notice, and rightly so.
He's trying to work out how he did it, and he has a flashback to the pool, and thinks he can remember pushing up from the bottom of the pool with his leg. Or did he? He's not so sure, but at this stage he's in the loungeroom in his dried chair and looks down to his feet, and... he can wiggle a coupla toes. For someone who wears crips suits most of the time, it's a convenient time for him to be wearing thongs. Frazer gets a look on his face, kinda like HOLY SMOKES and kinda like DON'T GET TOO EXCITED YET, and doesn't mention anything to Rosie. He does, however, tell her that he was thinking of his Mum and Paul when he was looking at Mickey, and he can't be responsible for another drowned kid, and Rosie hugged him and said "Oh, your dead brother" to fill in the gaps for anyone who hasn't been reading this blog. Two things here to save time, cos they were spaced out a bit - 1) over the course of the episode, Frazer does the whole "I think my legs are kinda working again" look a few times, and it's a sweet little-kid-with-big-eyes type thing, but he doesn't disclose to anyone what he's thinking. In fact, in a scene later on when they're at (**BLOG SPOILER**) the grand reopening of the new no-longer-Scarlet Bar, Toadie spills a tray of hot snacks over his legs, and Frazer jokes that it's not like he could feel it anyway, although his "Mmmmmft" face said different. And 2) Mickey's fine.
Everyone in Erinsborough must have heard about Mickey, although Susan and Janae are the only ones who know why Ned's even got the kid. Toadie assumes it's his nephew or something (also Stu's nephew then, silly?) and Karl goes on a bit of a "Where's his parents, the poor kid's in hospital" til Susan shushes him with a couple of her "Not now Karl"s. But Mickey's fine, sitting up, calling for his Mum, and then being generally pretty happy with Ned instead. It's all computer games and hangin out having fun until closing time when the nurse says they gotta vamoose. "Immediate family only" "But he's got noone else..." *You fucking dimwit* "Immediate family only." "Just a little longer?" *You fucking dimwit* "Look I don't make the rules. No touching!" *you fucking fucking fucking dimwit* "...I'm his Dad." The nurse is easily convinced, Toad & Steph who are there do a coupla OMGs (and Toadie makes THE most stupid face, like a sneaky eyes, then a O rly? and it's fantastic) and it takes a bit longer for Mickey, but he's pretty happy with the outcome, so that's all cool. Can't remember if this went any further than the usual "How come you weren't there when I was a kid?" shit, so onto the next plot thanks.
That'd be the relaunch of the Scarlet Bar then. Steph and Toad spend the arvo getting it ready, and there's shit a shitload of work going on, but by the evening everything scrubbed up fine, although nobody except Steph know what it's gonna be called. It's got a brown look to it, maybe a bit like the inside of a log cabin, and it's pretty swish, with the only real cosmetic part left over from the old bar being the SEGA motorbike game. They mention this a few times tonight, including still wondering who the top scoring THORN is, so that marathon-length plot hasn't been forgotten, just stretched out to 10x its recommended stretching point. I must admit though, the intrigue is building. Who could it be? Why is it taking so long to find out? WHO IS IT?? Anyways, Steph's all nervous nelly about the reopening, and there's a bit of talk with Toadie about her image for politics, but not much, and a lot of the folks are there for the big do. It's pretty much people chatting, and I'm streaming past all this now cos it's almost time to go home, but it's just people milling around, eating eats, drinking drinks, and then Steph makes a speech thanking everyone. "I hope this place becomes the third place in your life, like home, and work, and here, where you can come for a drink or a chat or even just to read a book." Sounds like the Alibi Room kinda did before you had to fight Andrew G for a chair. And with that, she unveils teh new name for the place: CHARLIE'S. Righto. Not a lot of thought put in there, but that's it. k. Everyting went well and everyone had a lovely time.
Except Adam. He was gonna be there at the opening, but instead pulled the world's most obvious u-turn. Steph: "You gonna be here tonight Adam?" "Wouldn't miss it for the world." "Oh good, you can get to know my Dad better", says Pepp. "Ooh, I just remembered, right now, that I've got a physio appt tonight. My shoulder's been killing me. For a coupla days. Byes!" Hmmm, thinks Pepp, so durnig the unveiling she hightails it to Adam's place where she was right to suspect he didn't have a suddenly days-old shoulder injury. As she knocks on the door, he's sitting on the couch staring at a photo of a bit of a hottie, which he puts away. She gives him the "For someone who's so against lying you do a lot of it" offence, and he admits that he didn't want to go when he heard about her Dad being there (even though he wasn't) but it's not what she thinks. Something to do with the photo girl he's eyeing off probably, but who is she? What does he mean? Is he telling the truth? So many questions. I think it's time to go home, find out some answers. Bye.
Wednesday 4 July 2007
Nobody's Pool (Tues, Jul 3 '07)
Forget everything you know about Neighbours, cos the CHANGE is already here. Or at least, they're having a go at something different, as suspense creeps in to the half hour carryon, heightening tension in a smaller equivalent to the plane crash WHO WILL DIE? a coupla years ago. Tonight though, it's WHO WILL JUMP INTO NO. 30'S POOL WITH THE FAULTY ELECTRICAL WIRING, and it's pretty effective.
Episode starts with a close up on the side of No. 30's (ex-House of Trouser, now the Pepper/Frazer/Rosie/Oliver/Ringo/Carmella/can't keep up house) backyard pool, showing either an underwater pool heater or light sparking, all BZZZT BZZZT SPRK SPRK SHHHHT, obviously a pretty major threat to whoever will dip their toe in the pool first. Considering it's the middle of Winter, and they're in Melbourne, that should be a pretty major threat in about 4 months, but nope, it's tonight, and the thing just keeps buzzing on. Oooh!
I think Rosie was the first one down to the pool, in her bathrobe and about to bikini on up, but tonight's best opportunity for perverts was foiled by something, perhaps a phone call? That's pretty much the trend for tonight - people are about to get in the electropool, OMG it's gonna be them!!! But then something crops up to stop them from launching in. We'll say the first one's a phone call for Rosie from Toadie, with good news about Frazer's court case - the race track want to settle out of court, so that's pretty radly. She yells the news to Frazer who's down the pool too in his chair, and it's all happy. But there's a sinister BBZZZT SPRK SPRK KRK going on in the background, ready for death provision...
Meanwhile, the K-Ks are trying to get used to having Tom around, dementia man extrodinaire being very difficult, but at least he's consistently difficult I guess, still calling Zeke 'Karl', and unable to remember even the names of Susan, Billy, Libby or Mal. He still thinks Karl is a nurse, and it's really hard on the nondoc, being constantly berated by his Dad who he's trying to help, but he's being very noble and strong about it. But enough with the emotion, one of the problems of caring for a dementia patient pops its head up pretty early, as Tom wanders away from the house... K&S's heads pop up over the back fence to No. 30, and will we see Tom's wrinkly body floating with all his hair standing up in the pool...? No, of course not, it's just another teaser, and they head out to look for him, oblivious to teh BZZZT CHHT CCHHHT ZAP shit going on just under their noses.
Now up from the pool, Rosie's doing a bit of vacuuming while Frazer sits down by the pool listening to his ghetto blaster, although it's not Bon Jovi this time. Both of them notice problems with power supply, as it fades in and out as do the lights, so Rosie puts the call in to Toadie, landlord, to get this shit sorted. I guess this was when she found out about the out-of-court news, so I dunno what saved Rosie the first time fromt he electropool's clutches, but she definitely wasn't killed ok, and that's all that matters. But they do know there's shonky wiring going on, although everyone's still naive about the ZZZZZZZZZAP KTRT BZZZZZBZZZing that's going on unchecked down there. Damn, that pool must be full of electricity by now, and wikipedia that water wouldn't actually put the zaps out but somehow make them even more lethal, so the pool's like THE WORST place sparks could be flying! This tension is killing me. Hey, that was kinda a pun, cos I'm talking about a potentially lethal thing... The point is I didn't plan it, ok?
Frazer and Rosie and everyone are drawn back upstairs though as a huge commotion bursts through the front door, and it turns out the Cammenitti wedding planning party is there, comprised of Rosie/Carmella's mum, a couple of middle aged old-school Italian aunties dressed in that demogrpahic's stereotypical bright Kerri-Ann Kennerly colours, and some old bloke who everyone just assumes somebody else knows, cos he's joining in all the jokes, having a lovely biosterous time like everyone else and came in the same time as them. Of course, it's Tom, and he's having a ball. He's got his eye on one of the elderly aunts, and cracking a few Dadjokes here and there, and while Frazer and the newly-returned Ringo exchange a few "Who brought this bloke?" looks, the Italian OTT-ness means he goes fairly unnoticed. As a small plot, Ringo is back from his stay at home early, but everything went well, his mum couldn't stop talking about dead bro Paul, although his dad's still silent about that and pretty much everything. We'll be meeting him soon, surely. Carmella's been drawn into the Camenitti loungeroom palava, so she and Ringo makeup and forgive and I forget. 'Sall good basically. Anyways, teh family take over wedding planning duties in the TV-normal Italian overbearing way, and Mrs C tells everyone who tries to interrupt to shut it, she's paying for this wedding (ignoring even protests against that), and it's only the best for her gorgeous girl. Finally, Frazer's had enough and roars "SILENCIO!" and very politely informs Mrs C that she & the family are always welcome in their home, but she should be more polite and respectful to Rosie while she's here, and everyone's impressed by Frazer's diplomacy and balls, and it's all a bit more civil from then on.
There's probably a shot of a sparking wire in the pool at this point. Actually, I think there is, and the pool claims its first victim, a dead crow floating on teh electrified surface. Fkn hell, this tension is out of hand. It's definitely fatal, it's got a taste for flesh, and who knows where this pool with faulty wires will stop?
A plot we haven't touched on yet is Ned and Mickey - back in it tonight, and Ned STILL hasn't told Mickey he's his Dad, but he's gonna do it tonight over a special dinner. Ned's basically planning a ripsnorter little day for Mickey, taking him to the park, then off to the MCG for a footy game, then for a swim, then the special dinner. Wait a minute, did they say A SWIM?!? I hope it's not where I think it will of course be!!! But that's after the park and footy, and it's at the park where they first run into Paul. He doesn't have a clue who they are, and Ned grunts and makes it clear through his stunned mullet eyes that there's some bad blood. Paul's probs used to this by now, so he apologises for he doesn;t know what, and offers to try to get free footy tickets and buy them lunch. Doggy Jake's just eaten his sandwich off the park bench anyway, so they reluctantly trundle off to the General Store. Somehow, and I'm sure it was meant to be subtley conveyed through Ned's acting, Paul talks his way into Mickey's goodbooks, and Ned agrees to spend the day with this guy he apparently hates with no real explanation. The footy's sold out, so they just head to see the local Aussie Rules team the Erinsborough Dingoes, and do all the father-son-neighbour blokey bonding like eatnig a pie quickly and shouting with their arms up, all that stuff. Mickey's pretty stoked with all this, and when Paul mistakenly calls Ned his dad, Mickey says Ned's not his Dad, his dad's an astronaut and a race car driver and a time machine and a chocolate milkshake and he's just talking shit, but then he says he wishes Ned was his Dad. Ned doesn;t take this opportunity to tell the kid, cos he's stupid. Paul finds out they're living at Lassiters cos Elle kicked them out so he could come home ("When Jake barks we just trun the tv up real loud") so to show off he's such a good bloke now, he invites them back, Elle's agreement notwithstanding. So they have a good day, and then tick off the next thing to do, go for a swim, and head to No. 30, where Oliver's sitting down the back with Frazer. BZZZFSDNHIUIO THERE ARE SPARKS EVERYWHERE FRRRZT Mickey's gonna have a dip, but then Ned has to go do something and it's so interesting I can't remember what, possibly stare at someone, so he leaves Mickey with the two boys. ELECTRICITY
Oliver's had a busy day too, or rather he probably hasn't, but Elle has on his behalf. After learning last night that Alan Napier's claiming to be his grandad in between comas, Oliver's convincing himself the old man's just got the Toms, but Elle's not so sure, which you can tell by the way she looks away a lot to devise a scheme. She gets one, as she goes back to Napier's bed and steals a DNA sample, like an eyelash or somefin, and takes one of Oliver's scandinavian hairs from his jacket. Then she pops on down to the forensic lab in the Erinsborough Hospital, and we're reintroduced to the sleazy dark-haired lab technician who's helped out the Robinsons with plenty of schemes in the past, including making it look like Elle had a terminal disease, and possibly something to do with Izzy's pregnancy, can't remember what, but it seems likely. He's a total grosser and reminds me a bit of Buck (who likes to fuck) from the Kill Bill movies. Or only the first one, very much. Anyways, he sleazes around Elle who's under the assumption that it's okay she's still using sneaky connections (no permission slips means it's illegal) because this time it's for good. k.
Meanwhile, back at the pool of death, nobody's hoppped in yet, but Oliver and Mickey are getting ready to go for a dip. They're both in their togs, Frazer's still down there but he's not so much up for a swim since his legs are on a sickie, and they're about to jump in. OMG, who's gonna get zapped first, Mickey or Oliver? Looks like Mickey, will it be... ZZZZZFFFFFFFSSSSS ZAP ZAP ZAP COME IN THE WATER'S FINE JUST A BIT KILLING... RING RING What? Oh lordy, Oliver's phone ringing, and he's called away to go meet with Elle with some very very important news. Oliver and Elle's relationship, even though they've agreed to take things slow, is pretty damn awkward at the moment, which they mentioned earlier. They're kinda half pretending they don't know each other, half pashing whenever they can. So Oliver chucks his scandinavain shirt back on his scandinavian torso and runs away, for Elle to tell him about he exploits, and that he can call this phone number if he wants to know the DNA results... This leaves the togged up Mickey and Frazer, netiher of whom are going in the water because the adult's in a wheelchair. Will ANYONE ever get zapped by this fkn pool? Rosie's still upstairs vacuuming and Toadie's promised repairs haven't come through yet, so it's still CHHHHK BRRRRRRRT >:( >:( >:(ing away, but doesn't look like anyone's going in. Oh hang on, what's that floating in the pool, Mickey? Is that a dead bird? Oooh, gross. Better get that out hey. Frazer warns him against it, but he's leaning in to touch it, Frazer suddenly notices the SPARK SPARK ELECTRICITY, there's a close up of his eyes, a fast motion montage of Mickey leaning in, Frazer's realisation, the sparking sparks, Mickey leaning, Frazer thinking, sparks sparking, Mickey, Frazer, sparks, M, F, s, MFS, mfsmfsmfs... "NOOOOO!" Too late Frazer, as Mickey touches the bird or water or whatever would zap him and one unfilmed stunt later, he's floating facedown in the water. Fortunately, it was at this point that the vacuum upstairs gave off a little puff of smoke (which looked pretty cool), so Rosie flicked all the mains, meaning that Mickey only copped a second or 2 of the fullshock. I have no idea what this means for his survival though, and we finish as Frazer finds himself in a very familiar position, on the side of a pool with a kid floating possibly dead but unable to help. Thankfully this time, he hollers really loud for "ROSIE!!!" but will it do any good? The pool's power has been reduced for now... but for how long?
Sinister episode.
Episode starts with a close up on the side of No. 30's (ex-House of Trouser, now the Pepper/Frazer/Rosie/Oliver/Ringo/Carmella/can't keep up house) backyard pool, showing either an underwater pool heater or light sparking, all BZZZT BZZZT SPRK SPRK SHHHHT, obviously a pretty major threat to whoever will dip their toe in the pool first. Considering it's the middle of Winter, and they're in Melbourne, that should be a pretty major threat in about 4 months, but nope, it's tonight, and the thing just keeps buzzing on. Oooh!
I think Rosie was the first one down to the pool, in her bathrobe and about to bikini on up, but tonight's best opportunity for perverts was foiled by something, perhaps a phone call? That's pretty much the trend for tonight - people are about to get in the electropool, OMG it's gonna be them!!! But then something crops up to stop them from launching in. We'll say the first one's a phone call for Rosie from Toadie, with good news about Frazer's court case - the race track want to settle out of court, so that's pretty radly. She yells the news to Frazer who's down the pool too in his chair, and it's all happy. But there's a sinister BBZZZT SPRK SPRK KRK going on in the background, ready for death provision...
Meanwhile, the K-Ks are trying to get used to having Tom around, dementia man extrodinaire being very difficult, but at least he's consistently difficult I guess, still calling Zeke 'Karl', and unable to remember even the names of Susan, Billy, Libby or Mal. He still thinks Karl is a nurse, and it's really hard on the nondoc, being constantly berated by his Dad who he's trying to help, but he's being very noble and strong about it. But enough with the emotion, one of the problems of caring for a dementia patient pops its head up pretty early, as Tom wanders away from the house... K&S's heads pop up over the back fence to No. 30, and will we see Tom's wrinkly body floating with all his hair standing up in the pool...? No, of course not, it's just another teaser, and they head out to look for him, oblivious to teh BZZZT CHHT CCHHHT ZAP shit going on just under their noses.
Now up from the pool, Rosie's doing a bit of vacuuming while Frazer sits down by the pool listening to his ghetto blaster, although it's not Bon Jovi this time. Both of them notice problems with power supply, as it fades in and out as do the lights, so Rosie puts the call in to Toadie, landlord, to get this shit sorted. I guess this was when she found out about the out-of-court news, so I dunno what saved Rosie the first time fromt he electropool's clutches, but she definitely wasn't killed ok, and that's all that matters. But they do know there's shonky wiring going on, although everyone's still naive about the ZZZZZZZZZAP KTRT BZZZZZBZZZing that's going on unchecked down there. Damn, that pool must be full of electricity by now, and wikipedia that water wouldn't actually put the zaps out but somehow make them even more lethal, so the pool's like THE WORST place sparks could be flying! This tension is killing me. Hey, that was kinda a pun, cos I'm talking about a potentially lethal thing... The point is I didn't plan it, ok?
Frazer and Rosie and everyone are drawn back upstairs though as a huge commotion bursts through the front door, and it turns out the Cammenitti wedding planning party is there, comprised of Rosie/Carmella's mum, a couple of middle aged old-school Italian aunties dressed in that demogrpahic's stereotypical bright Kerri-Ann Kennerly colours, and some old bloke who everyone just assumes somebody else knows, cos he's joining in all the jokes, having a lovely biosterous time like everyone else and came in the same time as them. Of course, it's Tom, and he's having a ball. He's got his eye on one of the elderly aunts, and cracking a few Dadjokes here and there, and while Frazer and the newly-returned Ringo exchange a few "Who brought this bloke?" looks, the Italian OTT-ness means he goes fairly unnoticed. As a small plot, Ringo is back from his stay at home early, but everything went well, his mum couldn't stop talking about dead bro Paul, although his dad's still silent about that and pretty much everything. We'll be meeting him soon, surely. Carmella's been drawn into the Camenitti loungeroom palava, so she and Ringo makeup and forgive and I forget. 'Sall good basically. Anyways, teh family take over wedding planning duties in the TV-normal Italian overbearing way, and Mrs C tells everyone who tries to interrupt to shut it, she's paying for this wedding (ignoring even protests against that), and it's only the best for her gorgeous girl. Finally, Frazer's had enough and roars "SILENCIO!" and very politely informs Mrs C that she & the family are always welcome in their home, but she should be more polite and respectful to Rosie while she's here, and everyone's impressed by Frazer's diplomacy and balls, and it's all a bit more civil from then on.
There's probably a shot of a sparking wire in the pool at this point. Actually, I think there is, and the pool claims its first victim, a dead crow floating on teh electrified surface. Fkn hell, this tension is out of hand. It's definitely fatal, it's got a taste for flesh, and who knows where this pool with faulty wires will stop?
A plot we haven't touched on yet is Ned and Mickey - back in it tonight, and Ned STILL hasn't told Mickey he's his Dad, but he's gonna do it tonight over a special dinner. Ned's basically planning a ripsnorter little day for Mickey, taking him to the park, then off to the MCG for a footy game, then for a swim, then the special dinner. Wait a minute, did they say A SWIM?!? I hope it's not where I think it will of course be!!! But that's after the park and footy, and it's at the park where they first run into Paul. He doesn't have a clue who they are, and Ned grunts and makes it clear through his stunned mullet eyes that there's some bad blood. Paul's probs used to this by now, so he apologises for he doesn;t know what, and offers to try to get free footy tickets and buy them lunch. Doggy Jake's just eaten his sandwich off the park bench anyway, so they reluctantly trundle off to the General Store. Somehow, and I'm sure it was meant to be subtley conveyed through Ned's acting, Paul talks his way into Mickey's goodbooks, and Ned agrees to spend the day with this guy he apparently hates with no real explanation. The footy's sold out, so they just head to see the local Aussie Rules team the Erinsborough Dingoes, and do all the father-son-neighbour blokey bonding like eatnig a pie quickly and shouting with their arms up, all that stuff. Mickey's pretty stoked with all this, and when Paul mistakenly calls Ned his dad, Mickey says Ned's not his Dad, his dad's an astronaut and a race car driver and a time machine and a chocolate milkshake and he's just talking shit, but then he says he wishes Ned was his Dad. Ned doesn;t take this opportunity to tell the kid, cos he's stupid. Paul finds out they're living at Lassiters cos Elle kicked them out so he could come home ("When Jake barks we just trun the tv up real loud") so to show off he's such a good bloke now, he invites them back, Elle's agreement notwithstanding. So they have a good day, and then tick off the next thing to do, go for a swim, and head to No. 30, where Oliver's sitting down the back with Frazer. BZZZFSDNHIUIO THERE ARE SPARKS EVERYWHERE FRRRZT Mickey's gonna have a dip, but then Ned has to go do something and it's so interesting I can't remember what, possibly stare at someone, so he leaves Mickey with the two boys. ELECTRICITY
Oliver's had a busy day too, or rather he probably hasn't, but Elle has on his behalf. After learning last night that Alan Napier's claiming to be his grandad in between comas, Oliver's convincing himself the old man's just got the Toms, but Elle's not so sure, which you can tell by the way she looks away a lot to devise a scheme. She gets one, as she goes back to Napier's bed and steals a DNA sample, like an eyelash or somefin, and takes one of Oliver's scandinavian hairs from his jacket. Then she pops on down to the forensic lab in the Erinsborough Hospital, and we're reintroduced to the sleazy dark-haired lab technician who's helped out the Robinsons with plenty of schemes in the past, including making it look like Elle had a terminal disease, and possibly something to do with Izzy's pregnancy, can't remember what, but it seems likely. He's a total grosser and reminds me a bit of Buck (who likes to fuck) from the Kill Bill movies. Or only the first one, very much. Anyways, he sleazes around Elle who's under the assumption that it's okay she's still using sneaky connections (no permission slips means it's illegal) because this time it's for good. k.
Meanwhile, back at the pool of death, nobody's hoppped in yet, but Oliver and Mickey are getting ready to go for a dip. They're both in their togs, Frazer's still down there but he's not so much up for a swim since his legs are on a sickie, and they're about to jump in. OMG, who's gonna get zapped first, Mickey or Oliver? Looks like Mickey, will it be... ZZZZZFFFFFFFSSSSS ZAP ZAP ZAP COME IN THE WATER'S FINE JUST A BIT KILLING... RING RING What? Oh lordy, Oliver's phone ringing, and he's called away to go meet with Elle with some very very important news. Oliver and Elle's relationship, even though they've agreed to take things slow, is pretty damn awkward at the moment, which they mentioned earlier. They're kinda half pretending they don't know each other, half pashing whenever they can. So Oliver chucks his scandinavain shirt back on his scandinavian torso and runs away, for Elle to tell him about he exploits, and that he can call this phone number if he wants to know the DNA results... This leaves the togged up Mickey and Frazer, netiher of whom are going in the water because the adult's in a wheelchair. Will ANYONE ever get zapped by this fkn pool? Rosie's still upstairs vacuuming and Toadie's promised repairs haven't come through yet, so it's still CHHHHK BRRRRRRRT >:( >:( >:(ing away, but doesn't look like anyone's going in. Oh hang on, what's that floating in the pool, Mickey? Is that a dead bird? Oooh, gross. Better get that out hey. Frazer warns him against it, but he's leaning in to touch it, Frazer suddenly notices the SPARK SPARK ELECTRICITY, there's a close up of his eyes, a fast motion montage of Mickey leaning in, Frazer's realisation, the sparking sparks, Mickey leaning, Frazer thinking, sparks sparking, Mickey, Frazer, sparks, M, F, s, MFS, mfsmfsmfs... "NOOOOO!" Too late Frazer, as Mickey touches the bird or water or whatever would zap him and one unfilmed stunt later, he's floating facedown in the water. Fortunately, it was at this point that the vacuum upstairs gave off a little puff of smoke (which looked pretty cool), so Rosie flicked all the mains, meaning that Mickey only copped a second or 2 of the fullshock. I have no idea what this means for his survival though, and we finish as Frazer finds himself in a very familiar position, on the side of a pool with a kid floating possibly dead but unable to help. Thankfully this time, he hollers really loud for "ROSIE!!!" but will it do any good? The pool's power has been reduced for now... but for how long?
Sinister episode.
Heart To Hard (Mon, Jul 2 '07)
Alright, a bit happening in this one, including the arrival of more family members. Although THE CHANGE IS still COMING, this renewed ‘family-focus’ the press talked about has already been ramped up a fair bit over the past few weeks, giving Frazer & Ringo a mum (and presumably dad to come), Ned a son, Paul an ex-wife and tonight bringing Karl’s dad to the street. Tom arrives in Ramsay Street outta the home he was causing trouble in, and he’s pretty damn senile. He’s got the mental deterioration going on a treat, and with his constantly loud outside voice, thinks Karl and Susan are namby-pamby nurses, and Zeke is Karl. Crikey Tom, you’ve lost it mate. He gives a lot of shit to Karl over the course of this episode, and over the course of a few scenes in the loungeroom/dining room, the family deals with the new arrival. Susan basically just offers Karl sympathetic looks, Karl cops it something bad from Tom about getting his hands off his stuff, and stop calling me Dad, Rachel does nothing memorable, and Zeke is called Karl. The real non-doc Karl advises that the best thing to do with senility patients is to play along with their fantasies, so Zeke assumes the role of Karl, playing chess with Tom and looking over old pictures. Eventually irl Karl gets a bonding idea, grabs a record player from the garage, and plays one of Tom’s old favourite ‘40s songs about loving his love, and the two do bond. Although Tom still has no idea who anyone is. Susan’s taken (MORE!) leave to help with him, and the kids are more than happy to lend a hand, but Karl’s not so sure, saying he needs nursing, not just minding. We’ll see. Fingers crossed for a recovery.
Another forgetful dad is Paul who’s helping Elle out with Lassiters again. They’re having a coffee at the shop when she gets a call from Oliver that two regular customers, Misters Wrigley and Wong, have had stuff stolen from the cloak room, and the only 2 suspects are 2 longterm and trustworthy staff. Elle says to fire them etc, but Paul adds a bit of diplomacy and with Elle reluctantly agreeing for him to dip his finger back into management, he negotiates a WIN-WIN-WIN solution for the hotel, the high rolling lunchers and the probably not actually guilty staff. I don’t know how he did that, but Elle seemed very impressed. Paul wasn’t, however, when he walked in on Elle & Oliver getting a bit pashy at the hotel. He was mildly shocked and didn’t really say anything, but later on in a sweet scene when he’s inexplicably helping Harold clean up the General Store, he admits he thinks Oliver’s on the rebound and he only wants what’s best for Elle. They do all the “Do you come down hard or let them learn from their mistakes?” conversation, and Harold tells Paul he’s sounding like a Dad, and Paul’s pleased. It’s only because Harold’s the only face he really knows in the street, but the relationship between these two has always been intriguing, the angel and devil in the street, and each responsible for each other’s salvation at one point in time, so it’s wonderful to see them so friendly. Paul being not nasty really hasn’t gone boring yet at all either – it’s still good tele.
Friday night’s Caleb/Sky/Boyd arc continues as well, and it’s just as boring. I can rant about how fucked Boyd is every night if you want, so I’ll try to keep it brief. The episode started with a continuation of last night’s kiss Caleb gave Sky with Boyd busting them. For some reason, Boyd appears to have just had a shower, and I think they’re still at the Timmins’ place, so why the dickens he’s walking around wet and with no shirt on is a really really hard question. The hell? Anyway, when he sees them kissing he’s all aggro, shoves Caleb off her and he’s all “Get off her!” and Sky’s all “WTF?” and screams “Get out!”, and Boyd’s all “You heard her!” and Skye’s all “I meant you! What are you doing? Get out!” and Boyd’s all “I’ll be next door if you need me” and everyone in the country is all “Who the fuck does he think he is?” and you guys are all “Yeah yeah you don’t like Boyd, we get it” and I’m all “Sorry, I’ll just get on with it, but he’s worse than ever now” and yeah.
Because there’s nowhere else to cop a milkshake in Erinsborough, Boyd runs into Caleb at the store again later (we’re really missing the Scarlet Bar) and ends up yelling at him some more, esp when Caleb says Boyd’s probs jealous. Holy dooley, that fires him up, and Caleb ends up having a heart attack, all “My pills! In my bag!”. Anyone else would feel bad about pressuring a heart transplant dude into having an attack, but Boyd is very Boydlike so feels nothing of the sort, and in fact at the hospital with Sky it comes out that maybe dorkheart was on the money, and Boyd’s feeling stuff for Sky again, a good few years after they broke up, and only a coupla weeks since he last broke up from his last shonky doc gf. She tells him he’s dreaming, her first good choice in forever. There’s then a prolonged scene of bedside Sky chatting with Caleb. Harold arives with Kerry a while in, which gives Boyd a chance to tell Harold that maybe they were wrong, and they should give Sky the benefit of the doubt. Ok whatever, we don’t really care, just someone of you guys leave already, would you?
This bedside chat gives the opportunity for one of the worst performances in recent Neighbours memory however. Cutting back from another scene we see a hospital sheet being helf up, and it comes down quickly to Caleb’s face offering a surefire surfwear-model-with-no-acting-experience smile saying “Peekaboo!” and he and Skye falling into a round of utterly forced laughter. It’s already just awful, the sort of fake, stilted and unnatural scene that critics of soapies offer up as an example of how shallow and worthless the genre is, but then, after the most pissweak tryhard attempt at a peekaboo every commited to tivo, Caleb asks for serious “I’m not over-exciting her, am I?” Oh man. Dude, just stop it, or at least look like you know you’re pulling the piss, because right now, this has gone from dull to embarrassing. I really hope that was the lowest rating 10 seconds in Neighbours history. Nonetheless, they keep talking, and Sky decides that it’s weird she finds herself fancying the guy who’s got Stinger’s heart, but that’s just science, and she really likes him, so bugger all that stuff, they should get plugging away. Can’t wait. Last month was the 20th anniversary of Scott & Charlene’s wedding, and I read that when they left for Qld, Kylie’s contract ran out about 3 months before Jason’s, so she had to go up there first, and he had to stay back to finish an apprenticeship or something, I dunno, and then leave. It made for a soft departure instead of lovebirds going off together, but was inevitable. I feel that way about Sky, that Stinger’s gone, and she’s just sticking around til her contract expires. She’s really truly deadweight and this plot is fucking shit. *feels strongly*
We saw Oliver quickly before in the Lassiters restaurant, but he’s got the other major revelation tonight. Paul busted Ollie snogging his daughter when he walked in with an urgent message – Alan Napier is asking for him. Alan Napier’s been in a coma for a month or 2, was a family friend and business partner to the Barnes family, and collapsed while trying to tell Oliver a deep dark family secret. Tonight he’s munbled “Oliver” a few times, had a flashback to his heart attack, which he saw from the camera’s pov, and is now awake but talking… slowly. Oliver takes Elle with him, and Alan’s clearly still a bit crook, as the scene is packed with potential twists and revelations, but not much dialogue. “Alan, this is Elle. Elle, this is Alan, an old family friend.” “Not… friend…” “What?” “Grand… fath… er” “On whose side, my mum’s or dad’s?” “They’re… not… your… p… a… re… n…ts” “What? What do you mean? Alan, tell me more” “*passes out again*” Right before he passes out though, Alan spies Paul Robinson peering into his room between the venetian blinds, and when Oliver looks up, Paul’s gone. It’s all very mysterious indeed, and does Paul have anythign to do with this secret, having mentioned he knew the Barnes family? Is it possible Paul had a fling with Alan Napier’s daughter, whoever that might be, 20 something years ago, and Elle and Oliver are half-siblings? It certianly wouldn’t be the first time they’ve done sibling incest in Erinsborough, the last one being Serena and that dude from Perth (Lukas or something?) and apparently there were more before. But that seems an unlikely chance. Maybe there’s somehing more sinister even. Oooh! Did Oliver just get interesting? We’ll find out soon enough. Unless, of course, we’re waiting for Alan to tell us.
Another forgetful dad is Paul who’s helping Elle out with Lassiters again. They’re having a coffee at the shop when she gets a call from Oliver that two regular customers, Misters Wrigley and Wong, have had stuff stolen from the cloak room, and the only 2 suspects are 2 longterm and trustworthy staff. Elle says to fire them etc, but Paul adds a bit of diplomacy and with Elle reluctantly agreeing for him to dip his finger back into management, he negotiates a WIN-WIN-WIN solution for the hotel, the high rolling lunchers and the probably not actually guilty staff. I don’t know how he did that, but Elle seemed very impressed. Paul wasn’t, however, when he walked in on Elle & Oliver getting a bit pashy at the hotel. He was mildly shocked and didn’t really say anything, but later on in a sweet scene when he’s inexplicably helping Harold clean up the General Store, he admits he thinks Oliver’s on the rebound and he only wants what’s best for Elle. They do all the “Do you come down hard or let them learn from their mistakes?” conversation, and Harold tells Paul he’s sounding like a Dad, and Paul’s pleased. It’s only because Harold’s the only face he really knows in the street, but the relationship between these two has always been intriguing, the angel and devil in the street, and each responsible for each other’s salvation at one point in time, so it’s wonderful to see them so friendly. Paul being not nasty really hasn’t gone boring yet at all either – it’s still good tele.
Friday night’s Caleb/Sky/Boyd arc continues as well, and it’s just as boring. I can rant about how fucked Boyd is every night if you want, so I’ll try to keep it brief. The episode started with a continuation of last night’s kiss Caleb gave Sky with Boyd busting them. For some reason, Boyd appears to have just had a shower, and I think they’re still at the Timmins’ place, so why the dickens he’s walking around wet and with no shirt on is a really really hard question. The hell? Anyway, when he sees them kissing he’s all aggro, shoves Caleb off her and he’s all “Get off her!” and Sky’s all “WTF?” and screams “Get out!”, and Boyd’s all “You heard her!” and Skye’s all “I meant you! What are you doing? Get out!” and Boyd’s all “I’ll be next door if you need me” and everyone in the country is all “Who the fuck does he think he is?” and you guys are all “Yeah yeah you don’t like Boyd, we get it” and I’m all “Sorry, I’ll just get on with it, but he’s worse than ever now” and yeah.
Because there’s nowhere else to cop a milkshake in Erinsborough, Boyd runs into Caleb at the store again later (we’re really missing the Scarlet Bar) and ends up yelling at him some more, esp when Caleb says Boyd’s probs jealous. Holy dooley, that fires him up, and Caleb ends up having a heart attack, all “My pills! In my bag!”. Anyone else would feel bad about pressuring a heart transplant dude into having an attack, but Boyd is very Boydlike so feels nothing of the sort, and in fact at the hospital with Sky it comes out that maybe dorkheart was on the money, and Boyd’s feeling stuff for Sky again, a good few years after they broke up, and only a coupla weeks since he last broke up from his last shonky doc gf. She tells him he’s dreaming, her first good choice in forever. There’s then a prolonged scene of bedside Sky chatting with Caleb. Harold arives with Kerry a while in, which gives Boyd a chance to tell Harold that maybe they were wrong, and they should give Sky the benefit of the doubt. Ok whatever, we don’t really care, just someone of you guys leave already, would you?
This bedside chat gives the opportunity for one of the worst performances in recent Neighbours memory however. Cutting back from another scene we see a hospital sheet being helf up, and it comes down quickly to Caleb’s face offering a surefire surfwear-model-with-no-acting-experience smile saying “Peekaboo!” and he and Skye falling into a round of utterly forced laughter. It’s already just awful, the sort of fake, stilted and unnatural scene that critics of soapies offer up as an example of how shallow and worthless the genre is, but then, after the most pissweak tryhard attempt at a peekaboo every commited to tivo, Caleb asks for serious “I’m not over-exciting her, am I?” Oh man. Dude, just stop it, or at least look like you know you’re pulling the piss, because right now, this has gone from dull to embarrassing. I really hope that was the lowest rating 10 seconds in Neighbours history. Nonetheless, they keep talking, and Sky decides that it’s weird she finds herself fancying the guy who’s got Stinger’s heart, but that’s just science, and she really likes him, so bugger all that stuff, they should get plugging away. Can’t wait. Last month was the 20th anniversary of Scott & Charlene’s wedding, and I read that when they left for Qld, Kylie’s contract ran out about 3 months before Jason’s, so she had to go up there first, and he had to stay back to finish an apprenticeship or something, I dunno, and then leave. It made for a soft departure instead of lovebirds going off together, but was inevitable. I feel that way about Sky, that Stinger’s gone, and she’s just sticking around til her contract expires. She’s really truly deadweight and this plot is fucking shit. *feels strongly*
We saw Oliver quickly before in the Lassiters restaurant, but he’s got the other major revelation tonight. Paul busted Ollie snogging his daughter when he walked in with an urgent message – Alan Napier is asking for him. Alan Napier’s been in a coma for a month or 2, was a family friend and business partner to the Barnes family, and collapsed while trying to tell Oliver a deep dark family secret. Tonight he’s munbled “Oliver” a few times, had a flashback to his heart attack, which he saw from the camera’s pov, and is now awake but talking… slowly. Oliver takes Elle with him, and Alan’s clearly still a bit crook, as the scene is packed with potential twists and revelations, but not much dialogue. “Alan, this is Elle. Elle, this is Alan, an old family friend.” “Not… friend…” “What?” “Grand… fath… er” “On whose side, my mum’s or dad’s?” “They’re… not… your… p… a… re… n…ts” “What? What do you mean? Alan, tell me more” “*passes out again*” Right before he passes out though, Alan spies Paul Robinson peering into his room between the venetian blinds, and when Oliver looks up, Paul’s gone. It’s all very mysterious indeed, and does Paul have anythign to do with this secret, having mentioned he knew the Barnes family? Is it possible Paul had a fling with Alan Napier’s daughter, whoever that might be, 20 something years ago, and Elle and Oliver are half-siblings? It certianly wouldn’t be the first time they’ve done sibling incest in Erinsborough, the last one being Serena and that dude from Perth (Lukas or something?) and apparently there were more before. But that seems an unlikely chance. Maybe there’s somehing more sinister even. Oooh! Did Oliver just get interesting? We’ll find out soon enough. Unless, of course, we’re waiting for Alan to tell us.
Tuesday 3 July 2007
Forgive Us Our Sons (Fri, Jun 29 '07)
Friday night's episode felt like a little bit of a stopgap episode, just filling in some of the big developments we had earlier in the week, but it was notable for a fairly lowkey farewell to one of the main cast members, a no-suprise Lolly.
Updates first though, cos there wasn't much else going down. On Thurs night last week, we finally heard the story behind Frazer's brother's death with a teary expose (pron: expoazy - dunno how to do those tricky little accent inflection things) from Mrs Brown out at their joint in the bush. Tonight continued that conversation, and Frazer's mum was crying and sobbing and further explaining it and how it meant they treated Frazer different. Clearly still a bit touchy about it, she explained how Frazer, then 3, was just staring there looking at the body in the pool. "If only you'd done something, anything, yelled for help, *change* but you were too young, I know that *change* but still, you could have done something *change change*". Basically she knows it was wrong to blame Frazer, but she did anyway, and said that whenever they looked at him after that, etc etc etc. So he was right, she didn't really love him, and she goes crying into the house. Frazer was looking pretty damn upset through all this, but now more just plain sad, as opposed to the hurt outrage he had at the end of last ep, and Rosie was kneeling beside his wheelie giving him hugs, also looking sad. It was a sad moment. Got better though. Everyone kinda made up, Frazer came to terms with it a bit, and remembered where the pool had been (first time we've confirmed it was all at that house, I think), and said he always remembered the pool being at Uncle Walter's, etc etc. Rosie had a nice mum-in-law-to-be talk with sobbing Pru as well, giving her justifications for what she did, even though none of it was really that true, but it was a nice realistic family thing, finding ways to forgive people for stuff they did that was pretty well fucked.
The new feeling-their-way-back-into-each-other's-lives Browns (Mrs, Brown, Frazer Yeates and Rosie Caminetti) found their way back to da borough, where they all visited toolbag utecrasher Ringo in hospital. He was a bit shocked to see his Mum too, but they all 'splained everything, he made the connection between Paul's drowning and his fear of water, and he agreed to head home for a couple of days. Rachel was invited too, separate rooms, but she thought it would be better for Ringo and his mum to have some time workign things out. I'd try to get out of it too. She's a bit creep-out. All up, there's a new policy of No More Secrets in the family, but Frazer still can't feel his legs, and said to Rosie that he thinks it might just be time to accept it. NO FRAZER YOU CAN DO IT!
The only real progress this episode is in the grasping at straws Caleb, who got Stinger’s heart and lost all his family and friends cos they won’t talk to him. Last we saw earlier in the week, he and Sky were convincing each other that they had a sort of connection, the Timminses were a little bit “ewww rack off”, and Boyd was concerning himself with everything. Nothing’s changed at the start of this one, until Cal comes bounding into the General Store with a couple of giftboxes. “Does Mrs Timmins like jewelry?” he asks a stonefaced Boyd who looks like he’s ready to quote a page he’s read in a medical textbook to prove that he knows whatever Caleb’s up to is wrong. Boyd knows best. Then Caleb bounces over to Sky and gives her one of the boxes. It’s a silver <3shaped locket with Scott engraved on it. “I got Scott engraved on it” he says, explaining why it’s got Scott engraved on it. Sky can’t possibly… no, she couldn’t… it must have cost him a fortune… well, okay. But he better not give the other one to Mrs Timmins, cos she’ll flip it bad.
Or maybe not. As soon as he saw what was going on, Boyd had pelted full barrel round to Mrs Timmins’s to tell her what’s going on. “pant pant… And he got Scott engraved on it” he explains. Janelle’s relationship with Boyd’s a little confusing. When he first knocks at the door she’s very reluctant to listen to him or invite him in, seeing as how he cheated on his wife who happened to be her daughter, and he’s a blatant fuckhead. But in an un-Janelle fashion, she relents, and he toughsooks his way inside and goes through the whole deal with her. In a bit of a twist, she agrees to meet with the transplantee, and wants him to come around that arvo, just to get it all out of the way. Boyd, meanwhile, decides to take things into his own hands, and heads down the skatepark where a few of the kids there knew Caleb. Caleb himself is a little dorky, or maybe more goofy looking, but is believable enough as a lanky kid who hangs around with other kids at a skatepark. When Boyd’s there talking to them, he looks like an undercover cop at a My Chemical Romance gig. He’s such a straightlaced social vigilante, with his crew cut, fucking pink polo, and constant “How dare you” glare, talking to these guys who for all we know could actually be skatekids. Sore thumb. Anyways, he rants at them all “Shame on you, shame on you all, no don’t try to correct my misinterpretations, just be scolded you disgusting people”, and their leader holds back one of the minions who’s going to throttle him. If I could do a rewrite, it would involve placing their leader out of arms reach from the clenched fist guy. They tell him he’s got his wires crossed, and that they haven’t turned their back on Caleb – he’s too ashamed to see them. He turns around, and scurries back to the Timmins house, full of more self-righteous contempt.
By this time, Caleb, Sky and Janelle are all feeling a bit awkward in the loungeroom. Janelle’s pretty sensible about the whole thing, and accepts the gift generously, but does want to feel his heart. That makes her cry, and you probably might have too if you’d seen it. Janelle’s a great cryer, and anything related to Stinger’s death pretty much sends me back over the edge too. That death & aftermath was done so amazingly fucking well, like Molly Jones on ACP well. *sniffle* Boyd arrives back in time to meet with them all, and with “Oh great” Caleb mutters what we’re all thinking as Hoyland strides back in. “Is he still here?” Yes Boyd. “I’ve been talking to your mates…” he says, and Caleb admits he’s the one who’s cut himself off from his parents and friends, but he sounds pretty ‘durr’ about it, like it was his only option. “I killed my best mate. I can’t look them in the eye. Sky and your family are my life now” he explains, in a freakin huge leap of logic, and instantly going from annoying waste of space to creepy obsessodude. Nobody else sees it that way though, and there’s no spooky music or sneaky eye movements when nobody’s watching, so I don’t think he really is a stalker or anything, but a line as big as that should really have some plot afterwards to back it up. Boyd tells him his mates want him back, Caleb says ‘sif, Boyd gives him his mate Jamie’s armband and says “He says you’d know what it means”, Caleb does (it means they want to be mates again evidentally. I was hoping it was a sign to punch the armband’s deliverer in the face.), and Janelle gives a little speech about how he’s got a real life, so go get it back or Stinger died for nothing, a perspective her granddaughter Kerry might refute. And here’s ya stinkin pendant. Janelle and Boyd wander off into the kitchen, and I’d love to hear that conversation. (“I knew we couldn’t trust him. Lucky you listened to me.” “What the hell are you doing in my house?”) Instad it stays with Caleb and Sky as we learn she doesn’t never wanna see him again, and he’s gonna finish the Stinger tribute wall before he shoves off. Wow. Fuck this is dull, although to be honest that’s probably just because it’s using three of the dullest characters around, Boyd (who’s not even fun to hate, he really just is a fuckhead), Sky (hopeless and pathetically gullible for a character who only 2 years ago was so street smart) and Caleb, who’s the latest in the long line of good looking but wooden acting young guest actors. Ned, Katya, Rob/Cam, Carmella and other younger guests had made the wooden youth tradition possibly the worst ongoing part of Neighbours for a while there, with but the same episode arrival of Frazer, Rosie, Pepper and Will last year blew that away, with the three remaining characters instantly great, and only the shortlived Will studying at the Home & Away school of looking TV Week good and leaving the acting and emotional roles to the veteran cast. Caleb’s pretty shit hey. Anyways, Sky and chumpo keep chatting, and by the end of the episode she also asks to feel his heart, but this time there’s a different response, and she doesn’t cry, but kisses him. Or maybe he kisses her. Either way, there’s a pash, and Boyd walks in with a “I can’t believe how right about everything I always am, my head’s gonna blow off my neck with aggressive smugness” look. That’s where it ends, and ruh-roh, Boyd looks like he’s gonna cause trouble. But that’s for tomorrow (or maybe later tonight if I stop taking so long, I’m running behind).
Otherwise, there’s a few short plots. Karl’s been getting calls from his dad Tom in the nursing home, complaining more and more about living there and getting worse and worse dementia. Karl’s been visiting him pretty often but he doesn’t remember. Susan suggests Tom come to stay with them, see how it goes, and Karl doesn’t want to burden her and the kids, but Suse insists, and after a bit of sweet-talking the nursing home, Tom’s going to come stay with them for a bit. I loved Tom’s previous appearances, he’s very much, as they say, a character, so looking forward to this.
Rachel’s back from her seemingly overnight stay with Katya in Adelaide, where I think she’s in a happy relationship with Paul McClane, who might be a footballer. I dunno, but she mentions it. Rachel’s only major scene tonight is visitign Ringo in hospital, where their frustration at each other is kinda brought up without turning into a real fight. He tells her he doesn’t love Carmella, but he loved the way she treated him, like an adult whose opinions mattered, whereas Rachel “just makes me feel stupid”. To be honest, he is a bit, but still, Rachel admits she does have control issues, stemming from the death of her mum and Katya’s disappearance etc etc, so she agrees to try to change with Ringo’s loving help, and there’s all sorts of cuddling etc.
The most noteworthy part of the episode though is the end of Lolly Allen, who I’m sure has been on the show longer than the 3 months the Dolly competition gave her, but probably not by much. After dropping hints earlier in the week that she wants tomove back home, she kinda does the same more tonight – Harold and Bree notice, but Lou and Zeke are obvious in their not noticing. For every attempted “I had fun at home”, Zeke meeted it with an OTT enthusiastic “Yeah, but not as fun as here hey!”, or when she mentioned to Lou she’s like to get back home more, it was all “Not in the school year love, too disruptive. But how about a weekend a month and school holidays!” “Err, sure” It was a few of these scenes, including one where Zeke and Lou bonded over making steak marinade instead of noticing the fact that their favourtie girl wanted to leave. Eventually, Harold talked to Lou, Bree to Zeke, and Lou gave Lolly a surprise, 2 tickets to Russia in a week’s time, so she can come with him to meet Mishka. Just hearing her name makes me pine for her. Then he tells her he’ll pick her up from DadJohn’s place – he’s taking her back this afternoon. She’s happy but sad, all the usual reactions, but Zeke’s downright upset, poor fella. So that arvo she’s all packed up, presumably finding green bras and wallets she stole in her first coupla days on the street, and ready to leave. The farewell scene was really well done, a whole bunch of neighbours out the front of their house while she ran around saying “Thanks for helping me with the whole Sandy thing” and “You’re the best big sister ever” and Lou honked the horn. Sheesh Lou, you’ve only given the girl a coupla hours notice she’s moving out, give her an extra 5 minutes. Zeke’s allowed to come for the drive too (she gave him a goodbye kiss earlier – I think it was meant to be a pash, cos their heads moved a bit, but it lasted for approx 2 seconds. So cute.) so Lolly, Lou and Zeke drive off, and through the windows as they drive around the curved end of Ramsay’s dead end we can see Harold, Sky and Bree, Karl and Susan, Rosie, Frazer and his mum, Rachel and Ringo all watching and waving, and some nice folky music plays, and it’s a erally sweet goodbye. As the camera goes through the back window, we see Bree, Rachel and Ringo walking after them waving, and it’s a bit the end of the super school gang, and it’s beautifully done, and tehn the camera’s up high looking down on the street, and Karl’s saying they’ll have Lou over for dinner next week, and Susan asks Harold if he wants to come get that salad bowl he lent them, and the school gang talk amongst themselves, and it’s a fantastic ending, like neighbours really do become good friends to both the show, and a character’s stint. Weepy sigh.
Then Sky walks back in to Caleb and says “It just won’t be the same around here without her” which we all know is absolute bullshit and with that she blows the feeling away, and then the kiss happens, all that brilliant wistful small self-contained village vibe gone. Still, bye Lolly. She won’t be missed, but I liked her after all that Sandy shit was sorted out. Now to see if Lou comes back from Moscow or not next week. Everyone else seems to be gaining family members, and he’s just lost his only one. Hmmm.
Updates first though, cos there wasn't much else going down. On Thurs night last week, we finally heard the story behind Frazer's brother's death with a teary expose (pron: expoazy - dunno how to do those tricky little accent inflection things) from Mrs Brown out at their joint in the bush. Tonight continued that conversation, and Frazer's mum was crying and sobbing and further explaining it and how it meant they treated Frazer different. Clearly still a bit touchy about it, she explained how Frazer, then 3, was just staring there looking at the body in the pool. "If only you'd done something, anything, yelled for help, *change* but you were too young, I know that *change* but still, you could have done something *change change*". Basically she knows it was wrong to blame Frazer, but she did anyway, and said that whenever they looked at him after that, etc etc etc. So he was right, she didn't really love him, and she goes crying into the house. Frazer was looking pretty damn upset through all this, but now more just plain sad, as opposed to the hurt outrage he had at the end of last ep, and Rosie was kneeling beside his wheelie giving him hugs, also looking sad. It was a sad moment. Got better though. Everyone kinda made up, Frazer came to terms with it a bit, and remembered where the pool had been (first time we've confirmed it was all at that house, I think), and said he always remembered the pool being at Uncle Walter's, etc etc. Rosie had a nice mum-in-law-to-be talk with sobbing Pru as well, giving her justifications for what she did, even though none of it was really that true, but it was a nice realistic family thing, finding ways to forgive people for stuff they did that was pretty well fucked.
The new feeling-their-way-back-into-each-other's-lives Browns (Mrs, Brown, Frazer Yeates and Rosie Caminetti) found their way back to da borough, where they all visited toolbag utecrasher Ringo in hospital. He was a bit shocked to see his Mum too, but they all 'splained everything, he made the connection between Paul's drowning and his fear of water, and he agreed to head home for a couple of days. Rachel was invited too, separate rooms, but she thought it would be better for Ringo and his mum to have some time workign things out. I'd try to get out of it too. She's a bit creep-out. All up, there's a new policy of No More Secrets in the family, but Frazer still can't feel his legs, and said to Rosie that he thinks it might just be time to accept it. NO FRAZER YOU CAN DO IT!
The only real progress this episode is in the grasping at straws Caleb, who got Stinger’s heart and lost all his family and friends cos they won’t talk to him. Last we saw earlier in the week, he and Sky were convincing each other that they had a sort of connection, the Timminses were a little bit “ewww rack off”, and Boyd was concerning himself with everything. Nothing’s changed at the start of this one, until Cal comes bounding into the General Store with a couple of giftboxes. “Does Mrs Timmins like jewelry?” he asks a stonefaced Boyd who looks like he’s ready to quote a page he’s read in a medical textbook to prove that he knows whatever Caleb’s up to is wrong. Boyd knows best. Then Caleb bounces over to Sky and gives her one of the boxes. It’s a silver <3shaped locket with Scott engraved on it. “I got Scott engraved on it” he says, explaining why it’s got Scott engraved on it. Sky can’t possibly… no, she couldn’t… it must have cost him a fortune… well, okay. But he better not give the other one to Mrs Timmins, cos she’ll flip it bad.
Or maybe not. As soon as he saw what was going on, Boyd had pelted full barrel round to Mrs Timmins’s to tell her what’s going on. “pant pant… And he got Scott engraved on it” he explains. Janelle’s relationship with Boyd’s a little confusing. When he first knocks at the door she’s very reluctant to listen to him or invite him in, seeing as how he cheated on his wife who happened to be her daughter, and he’s a blatant fuckhead. But in an un-Janelle fashion, she relents, and he toughsooks his way inside and goes through the whole deal with her. In a bit of a twist, she agrees to meet with the transplantee, and wants him to come around that arvo, just to get it all out of the way. Boyd, meanwhile, decides to take things into his own hands, and heads down the skatepark where a few of the kids there knew Caleb. Caleb himself is a little dorky, or maybe more goofy looking, but is believable enough as a lanky kid who hangs around with other kids at a skatepark. When Boyd’s there talking to them, he looks like an undercover cop at a My Chemical Romance gig. He’s such a straightlaced social vigilante, with his crew cut, fucking pink polo, and constant “How dare you” glare, talking to these guys who for all we know could actually be skatekids. Sore thumb. Anyways, he rants at them all “Shame on you, shame on you all, no don’t try to correct my misinterpretations, just be scolded you disgusting people”, and their leader holds back one of the minions who’s going to throttle him. If I could do a rewrite, it would involve placing their leader out of arms reach from the clenched fist guy. They tell him he’s got his wires crossed, and that they haven’t turned their back on Caleb – he’s too ashamed to see them. He turns around, and scurries back to the Timmins house, full of more self-righteous contempt.
By this time, Caleb, Sky and Janelle are all feeling a bit awkward in the loungeroom. Janelle’s pretty sensible about the whole thing, and accepts the gift generously, but does want to feel his heart. That makes her cry, and you probably might have too if you’d seen it. Janelle’s a great cryer, and anything related to Stinger’s death pretty much sends me back over the edge too. That death & aftermath was done so amazingly fucking well, like Molly Jones on ACP well. *sniffle* Boyd arrives back in time to meet with them all, and with “Oh great” Caleb mutters what we’re all thinking as Hoyland strides back in. “Is he still here?” Yes Boyd. “I’ve been talking to your mates…” he says, and Caleb admits he’s the one who’s cut himself off from his parents and friends, but he sounds pretty ‘durr’ about it, like it was his only option. “I killed my best mate. I can’t look them in the eye. Sky and your family are my life now” he explains, in a freakin huge leap of logic, and instantly going from annoying waste of space to creepy obsessodude. Nobody else sees it that way though, and there’s no spooky music or sneaky eye movements when nobody’s watching, so I don’t think he really is a stalker or anything, but a line as big as that should really have some plot afterwards to back it up. Boyd tells him his mates want him back, Caleb says ‘sif, Boyd gives him his mate Jamie’s armband and says “He says you’d know what it means”, Caleb does (it means they want to be mates again evidentally. I was hoping it was a sign to punch the armband’s deliverer in the face.), and Janelle gives a little speech about how he’s got a real life, so go get it back or Stinger died for nothing, a perspective her granddaughter Kerry might refute. And here’s ya stinkin pendant. Janelle and Boyd wander off into the kitchen, and I’d love to hear that conversation. (“I knew we couldn’t trust him. Lucky you listened to me.” “What the hell are you doing in my house?”) Instad it stays with Caleb and Sky as we learn she doesn’t never wanna see him again, and he’s gonna finish the Stinger tribute wall before he shoves off. Wow. Fuck this is dull, although to be honest that’s probably just because it’s using three of the dullest characters around, Boyd (who’s not even fun to hate, he really just is a fuckhead), Sky (hopeless and pathetically gullible for a character who only 2 years ago was so street smart) and Caleb, who’s the latest in the long line of good looking but wooden acting young guest actors. Ned, Katya, Rob/Cam, Carmella and other younger guests had made the wooden youth tradition possibly the worst ongoing part of Neighbours for a while there, with but the same episode arrival of Frazer, Rosie, Pepper and Will last year blew that away, with the three remaining characters instantly great, and only the shortlived Will studying at the Home & Away school of looking TV Week good and leaving the acting and emotional roles to the veteran cast. Caleb’s pretty shit hey. Anyways, Sky and chumpo keep chatting, and by the end of the episode she also asks to feel his heart, but this time there’s a different response, and she doesn’t cry, but kisses him. Or maybe he kisses her. Either way, there’s a pash, and Boyd walks in with a “I can’t believe how right about everything I always am, my head’s gonna blow off my neck with aggressive smugness” look. That’s where it ends, and ruh-roh, Boyd looks like he’s gonna cause trouble. But that’s for tomorrow (or maybe later tonight if I stop taking so long, I’m running behind).
Otherwise, there’s a few short plots. Karl’s been getting calls from his dad Tom in the nursing home, complaining more and more about living there and getting worse and worse dementia. Karl’s been visiting him pretty often but he doesn’t remember. Susan suggests Tom come to stay with them, see how it goes, and Karl doesn’t want to burden her and the kids, but Suse insists, and after a bit of sweet-talking the nursing home, Tom’s going to come stay with them for a bit. I loved Tom’s previous appearances, he’s very much, as they say, a character, so looking forward to this.
Rachel’s back from her seemingly overnight stay with Katya in Adelaide, where I think she’s in a happy relationship with Paul McClane, who might be a footballer. I dunno, but she mentions it. Rachel’s only major scene tonight is visitign Ringo in hospital, where their frustration at each other is kinda brought up without turning into a real fight. He tells her he doesn’t love Carmella, but he loved the way she treated him, like an adult whose opinions mattered, whereas Rachel “just makes me feel stupid”. To be honest, he is a bit, but still, Rachel admits she does have control issues, stemming from the death of her mum and Katya’s disappearance etc etc, so she agrees to try to change with Ringo’s loving help, and there’s all sorts of cuddling etc.
The most noteworthy part of the episode though is the end of Lolly Allen, who I’m sure has been on the show longer than the 3 months the Dolly competition gave her, but probably not by much. After dropping hints earlier in the week that she wants tomove back home, she kinda does the same more tonight – Harold and Bree notice, but Lou and Zeke are obvious in their not noticing. For every attempted “I had fun at home”, Zeke meeted it with an OTT enthusiastic “Yeah, but not as fun as here hey!”, or when she mentioned to Lou she’s like to get back home more, it was all “Not in the school year love, too disruptive. But how about a weekend a month and school holidays!” “Err, sure” It was a few of these scenes, including one where Zeke and Lou bonded over making steak marinade instead of noticing the fact that their favourtie girl wanted to leave. Eventually, Harold talked to Lou, Bree to Zeke, and Lou gave Lolly a surprise, 2 tickets to Russia in a week’s time, so she can come with him to meet Mishka. Just hearing her name makes me pine for her. Then he tells her he’ll pick her up from DadJohn’s place – he’s taking her back this afternoon. She’s happy but sad, all the usual reactions, but Zeke’s downright upset, poor fella. So that arvo she’s all packed up, presumably finding green bras and wallets she stole in her first coupla days on the street, and ready to leave. The farewell scene was really well done, a whole bunch of neighbours out the front of their house while she ran around saying “Thanks for helping me with the whole Sandy thing” and “You’re the best big sister ever” and Lou honked the horn. Sheesh Lou, you’ve only given the girl a coupla hours notice she’s moving out, give her an extra 5 minutes. Zeke’s allowed to come for the drive too (she gave him a goodbye kiss earlier – I think it was meant to be a pash, cos their heads moved a bit, but it lasted for approx 2 seconds. So cute.) so Lolly, Lou and Zeke drive off, and through the windows as they drive around the curved end of Ramsay’s dead end we can see Harold, Sky and Bree, Karl and Susan, Rosie, Frazer and his mum, Rachel and Ringo all watching and waving, and some nice folky music plays, and it’s a erally sweet goodbye. As the camera goes through the back window, we see Bree, Rachel and Ringo walking after them waving, and it’s a bit the end of the super school gang, and it’s beautifully done, and tehn the camera’s up high looking down on the street, and Karl’s saying they’ll have Lou over for dinner next week, and Susan asks Harold if he wants to come get that salad bowl he lent them, and the school gang talk amongst themselves, and it’s a fantastic ending, like neighbours really do become good friends to both the show, and a character’s stint. Weepy sigh.
Then Sky walks back in to Caleb and says “It just won’t be the same around here without her” which we all know is absolute bullshit and with that she blows the feeling away, and then the kiss happens, all that brilliant wistful small self-contained village vibe gone. Still, bye Lolly. She won’t be missed, but I liked her after all that Sandy shit was sorted out. Now to see if Lou comes back from Moscow or not next week. Everyone else seems to be gaining family members, and he’s just lost his only one. Hmmm.
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