Tues, June 12 07

I've gotta start remembering the name of each episode for this blog. I've never seen a better collection of cheesy yet retrospectively explanatory puns.

Last night was this week's first appearance by Paul, who after his brain tumour removal last week, seems to be recovering okay, except his memory doesn't go beyond the late '80s. So he was very upset to discover that Jim and Gran had died long ago, and had no idea who Elle was. Even though I didn't watch Neighbours very much when those older cast membes were on it, they're still pretty famous, and I love the way there's ample referencing to history and old cast members. Karl & Susan are off visiting Billy & Anne, and even just the fact it was an issue that Steph hadn't told Max about Boyd's shit running off with dodgy "Dr" Charlotte Stone, is brilliant. It makes the Erinsborough world all the more real, and I live in hope one day of a Connor reappearance.

Anyways, Paul came out of hospital last night and returned to Ramsay Street. He didn't know which house was his, and I had to agree with him, as I always struggle to remember who lives in which house - except No. 30 (nee House of Trouser) - but the issue was more involved, as he went to go into the original house he lived in with Jim etc, then No. 30 which Jim gave him for a wedding present, and then finally Elle led him to their current house. Elle's being pretty honest with her dad, but not completely, to save him heartache in the short term, which I guess you'd want to do, but what the heck? As if he's not going to find out that his beautiful sons aren't overseas like she said, but one's dead, and the other a nutbar murderer in jail. He's being all wise and nice and unselfish, so it's a bit unnerving, but I do miss the evil Paul. He's such a great villain. I hope this gets more interesting.

Heaps of Oliver/Carmella shit last night, and Oliver's being a bit of a cunt which is funny. At least it's a stain on his beige personality. Again, please just get the emphasis off these two because it's standard tiresome soapie bullshit, although when Carmella spoke about their first date, which was atcually with Ollie's brother Will, that showed a bit of promise. No, actually not really at all. Boring. And the underplot of Ringo and Carmella's relationship is a bit silly too. Ringo needs a strong partner like Rachel or else he'll wander into the Boring camp too, and that's already over capacity.

Never fear, Janae didn't drown, but instead walked out of the ocean herself. Ned's right into her, but when he went in for a post-drowning pash, she told him to bugger off, which is the ocrrect repsonse. Still, he's trying to make her jealous by pretending to get it on with another camping girl who was in on the ruse, but since he's stopped being Paul's henchman, Ned's schemes are a bit pissweak. No real progress here - he still likes her, she hasn't said she does, but I fear it's getting close that she will express interest, and settle back in to another shithouse relationship. Fingers crossed Bree gets on the case, and devises a plan to reveal what a boring tepid guy Ned is. Taping him and watching him for approx 6mins 3 nights/week should do the trick.

In a prophetic piece of synchronicity for this blog, Rachel was worried that nobody liked the school webzine (The Borough, nee BUNS), mainly cos people posted the usual internet slander shit on it, so she's done the old go-back-on-your-principals-for-success storyline. She's posted the video of Zeke and Lolly getting busted pashing, and Ringo's telling her it's wrong. She's also on his back that not going to uni will be a waste of his life, instead of his current plan to open a fruit stall. Fucking hell those two are getting old fast.

With Paul not really being Paul, and Janae being compromised with an appalling storyline, it was a bit of a non-event last night, missing most of the show's best characters. Which can only be good, meaning a strong Toadie/Karl/Susan/Frazer/Rosie/Pepper/Harold/Zeke show coming up.

And can Bree please get a flipping storyline soon?

Thanks.